Why The Strongest Couples Are Those With Little In Common

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secret to a strong relationship
Love

If you're exactly the same, you can't grow.

By Nisha Baghadia

What makes a relationship last? Is it the chemistry you both have? Or compatibility? Or is it how much you enjoy each other’s company?

Well, a relationship isn’t just about all those things.

You may have a good time together, but that’s because you share interests, hobbies, and values, and that’s what brought you together in the first place. But compatibility in a relationship is not limited to the similarities you both have. It’s so much more.

Your partner should be someone who is different from you in certain key ways. Yes, dating a parallel may seem more comforting, but that does not give the relationship any scope for growth.

Whereas, if your partner is someone who challenges you and helps you grow on every level, despite the fights, then there can be nothing better. Because, personal growth begins when someone significant gives you the boost and push needed to stand up and fight for yourself.

One’s Strengths Offsets The Other’s Weaknesses

If your significant other is the same as you, then you probably share the same strengths, and that leaves no scope to cover up the shortcomings.

You need to date someone whose strengths can offset your weaknesses and vice versa. That way, you can always learn and admire someone who accomplishes in areas you struggle in. You can help each other by filling in the gaps the other person fails to fill.

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When you are different and possess varied strengths, your partner will appreciate you more, with no ego regarding the same. By learning from your partner’s strengths, and vice versa, you cancel out each other’s weaknesses.

Twinning in a relationship won’t expose you to new and challenging situations, and you will lack the support if you both fail to excel in something.

You Will Enhance Each Other’s Lives

Yes, it’s true, you both may be different, and your opinions may not often align. But, so what? It makes the relationship more intense and joyful.

By stepping into each other’s shoes, you gain contrasting experiences, and you see life in a whole new perspective.

Your ideal half may not understand your sense of humor nor enjoy the same TV shows you love, but that way you get to share and talk about something different.

It enhances the relationship by always having something new, exciting, and different to learn about the other. You share new experiences, push personal boundaries, and grow together, and that always keeps the spark burning in your relationship.

You Fight Constantly, But You Forgive And Forget

Your partner may sometimes make you want to pull your hair out – trust me, we have all been there. But you need to acknowledge the fact that your opinions differ, and it’s not important that you have to agree on everything.

But, over time, you will accept and appreciate each other exactly the way you are. And yes, that includes all those irksome differences.

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As a couple, you both only evolve and grow as you learn to accept your partner’s desires and thoughts. With time, you will realize that your partner’s flaws aren’t even flaws. You will always butt heads, and you will fight, but if you have the heart to apologize when you are at fault, then you will be okay.

Together You Will Be Better

It’s true, you will enhance each other’s lives, but as a couple, you will spread positive vibes. You will learn to cherish each other’s personalities.

Every day, you will feel motivated to gain new experiences and learn something new. If you are with someone who makes you lazy and too comfortable, then there is no scope for growth as you are not motivated.

When you force yourself to try to see things from the other person’s perspective, you see things clearer. Your soulmate might complain if he doesn’t enjoy what you like to do, but by giving each other the opportunity to look into how the other’s mind works, you become more accepting of other people.

The strongest of couples aren’t made up of parallel people. Don’t choose someone who just follows you blindly or someone who doesn’t challenge you.

Let your significant other surprise you every day, and you will be amazed to understand how the world has shaped their views and beliefs that they hold dear.

There are no perfect couples, and if you have no disagreements or fights, it only makes it too superficial. But if you have moved past the difficulties and fights, that means despite all these differences you have stuck together, and this knowledge only strengthens your relationship.

This article was originally published at The Good Men Project. Reprinted with permission from the author.