Photo: Instagram
SHOCKER.
By Emily Blackwood — Written on Sep 16, 2017
If you're like me and you're coping with the fact that Peter Kraus or Wells Adams isn't the next Bachelor by finding reasons to hate Arie Luyendyk Jr., then take a seat friends. Because I have a story for you.
So it sounds like Arie was just as unprepared to be The Bachelor as we are to watch him do it.
After Bachelor Nation announced his new title for the 2018 season, rumors started circulating that he broke up with his longtime girlfriend Sydney Stempfley just two days prior.
Ending a relationship you've been in over a year because you have the opportunity to date 30 women at the same time on TV? Sounds like a real winner.
Sydney squashed that rumor and told Entertainment Tonight that she and Arie broke up weeks ago. The last photo of them together on her Instagram account was posted June 1, so it's possible.
"We always had a great time, tons of fun," she told ET. "We made each other laugh and had just really a great relationship so I can’t complain there… [we] had great memories."
But the first weird thing you'll notice about Sydney and Arie's relationship is that it's not documented the same way on social media. Her Instagram has photos of the two hiking, drinking wine and snuggling puppies; along with all the cutesy, #MCM captions you use when you're in a committed, monogamous relationship.
Arie's Instagram, however, is just photos of himself.
Classic f--k boy move or clearing your Insta-cache before you become a reality star? We may never know.
Either way, it's weird. Because according to Sydney, they were in a decently serious relationship. They met each other's parents, spent the holidays together and he even lived with her for a brief period. And the breakup itself — whether it happened two days or two weeks before the announcement — was a surprise.
"The night before the breakup, we hung a light fixture together, made beef stew and I slept over," she said. "Everything was normal! It was just a regular day, so it definitely caught me by surprise. It was over the phone originally, just out of the heat of an argument, just a small argument."
"But then I went over to his place and we discussed it further and that’s kind of when it happened [for good] — it was in person. It was very emotional. You know, you’re trying to get answers and you can’t. I couldn't really get a definite answer … I've never seen him cry, ever. I could tell that he was emotional, but there wasn’t tears on his end."
Could it be because Arie never really considered his relationship with Sydney to be that serious? Or even monogamous?
Other than the obvious looking-more-single-than-I-actually-am social media sign, Arie was thought to still be dating fellow former Bachelor contestant Courtney Robertson. In fact, rumor has it that they've been dating on and off for about five years.
And even though there's zero evidence of Syndey on his Instagram. Arie left us a Courtney breadcrumb.
But of course we have to take into consideration that Sydney said they didn't meet / have a first date until July 2016, and that photo is from February 2016. But I would think a man is pulling some seriously shady shit if he's leaving up a photo of his ex-girlfriend and isn't posting any of me.
Still, Syndey said she believed the relationship was monogamous, but I don't think it's a stretch to say she might now have some doubts.
"I’m not assuming anything, I just... that’s all I know, is that at least on my end, yes, the relationship was monogamous."
And just to add one more little twist to this story, Sydney told ET that she applied to be a contestant on The Bachelor after her breakup with Arie, with no idea that he'd be the next Bachelor.
Because, why the hell not, right?
She wasn't far along into the process, just a simple online application, when she saw Arie's name being tossed around on Twitter as a potential Bachelor candidate.
According to her, she texted Arie for "the first time in awhile," and asked him about it — four days before the announcement. He called her and told her he hadn't been contacted by producers and promised he would tell her if he was.
So when she saw the announcement on Good Morning America, she was just as blindsided as the rest of the world.
"You can only believe what someone tells you, so, you know, there’s no proof that he had been auditioning or talking to producers at that point," she explains. “The only thing I have to go off of is his word."
She also said she hopes the relationship didn't end because of his Bachelor offer, but there's always the chance ABC will give us some solid drama and invite Sydney on the show to ask Arie herself.
"I loved him and he led me to believe that he loved me too," she admits. "We never said it, I think probably because we’re both very stubborn, but I thought the feeling was mutual. All in all, I guess we were just progressing at different rates."
Emily Blackwood is an editor at YourTango who covers pop culture, true crime, dating, relationships and everything in between. Every Wednesday at 10:20 p.m. you can ask her any and all questions about self-love, dating, and relationships LIVE on YourTango’s Facebook page. You can follow her on Instagram (@blackw00d) and Twitter (@emztweetz).