We Asked Guys: What Makes A Woman The 'Total Package'

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What Is The Total Package In A Woman
Love

Is it you?

When it comes to love, sex, and dating we've all got our own ideas as women what makes the "total package" when it comes to a man.

For some women, this "total package" is an ideal type of man who meets a stringent and intense list of unrealistic standards. For other women, the "total package" is the minimum requirement they expect of the man they expect to get along with romantically.

What the total package is when it comes to men is socially acceptable.

I mean, I can think of one thing that everyone woman would agree about: He has to have a heartbeat.

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But even writing that I'm sure that there are some female zombies or other members of the undead who are irate that I would make such a statement.

Knowing what kind of man is the total package is helpful for women going out into the wild, wacky (and sometimes) sticky world of dating. 

However, there's something that can be even more helpful: knowing what is the total package for a woman.

Because most guys aren't jerks who go around telling women what would make them better, I don't know what the average man thinks makes a woman who's the  "total package."

With that in mind, I decided to poll the men I know (and a bunch I don't) anonymously (so that we don't burn down their homes) and find what the average man thinks makes up the "total package" when it comes to the woman of their dreams. 

Here's what they had to say. Hopefully it will put your own total package into perspective and guide you on your dating journey. 

  • “Hates to shop. Loves to cook. Good job. Never has a headache.”
     
  • “Smart, funny, pretty, puts up with me.”
     
  • “A sense of humor combined with a distinctive sense of style that speaks to her originality, philosophy and self-worth.”
     
  • “Shall I quote the great American poet Ludacris? ‘Lady in the street, freak in the bed.’ In all seriousness — the perfect combination of friend and fanatic. Someone who compliments me and also pushes me for greatness.”


  • “Someone who loves me for myself supports me and who always has my back. Someone I can be myself with and have a good time. To feel safe secure and loved is all I ever wanted, and in return I give the same and will always look after the love of my life.”
     
  • “I like to put it this way... her looks get my attention, after that her personality keeps it. That's my philosophy on attraction.”
     
  • “A great personality, loves animals, cares for other people and sucks a good [penis].”
     
  • “Fresh memes and hot buns.”
     
  • “Empathy and patience. Looks play a role, too. I also like it when girls have experience with drugs simply because I like doing drugs.”
     
  • “Well, for me personally, initially I take notice of a person's looks, be it a cute face, nice smile, big boobs, long hair or whatever of the sort. But if there's gonna be anything after that, the person would have to be a nice person. Personality is important. No one wants to spend time with a person who's a piece of [crap] inside.”
     
  • “Smile, intelligence, eye contact, personality and sense of humor.”


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  • “Intelligence. Don't get me wrong, there has to be some level of physical attraction, but I have dated many one would rate as a 5 or 6 but if they are intelligent, they are a 9 or a 10 easily. Intelligence has a personality all its own. My spouse is lying asleep next to me and though we know different things, her intelligence is astounding and I love it, even get turned on by it, when she talks nerdy to me.”
     
  • “Too many things to mention. There's no one answer or the combination of a few. Just take care of yourself, eat right, exercise, never stop learning, and be good people.”
     
  • “If you have a glowing inviting personality, good hair, a cute face, common sense, and can show that you can take care of yourself physically and with your life in general, I will try to not be obsessed with you. Every woman has boobs and a butt.”
     
  • “Three criteria: Body, Mind, Heart.”
     
  • “Personally, for me my girlfriend just has it all. She can be adorable, then just incredibly sexy. Plus she's just a total sweetheart and is genuine and true to herself. Got me hooked.”
     
  • “Could be lots of things, the way her teeth aren't quite perfect and her canine teeth give her a mischievous grin. Maybe she walks past me and smells really nice. Maybe she wears her hair down one day and I notice the way it frames her face and flows when she walks. Maybe her laugh is so innocent and so genuinely happy. Maybe she makes eye contact with me and I'll notice how bright and soulful her eyes are, or the way she framed them with make up. Maybe I catch her singing, or dancing, or both.”
     
  • “Independence and a fighting spirit. I make a lot of reckless decisions so I can't be with someone who will go along with my bullshit. I need someone that's not afraid to call me out and offset my stupidity.”
     
  • “A juicy butt and she can spend more than 10 minutes off social media.”

Rebecca Jane Stokes is a sex, humor and lifestyle writer living in Brooklyn, New York with her cat, Batman. She hosts the sex, love, and dating advice show Becca After Dark on YourTango's Facebook Page every Tuesday and Thursday. For more of her work, click here

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