Heartbreak

If He Does These 14 Things, He's Way Too Immature To Be In A Relationship

Photo: Girts Ragelis/ Shutterstock
man relaxing on tree

It happens to the best of us. We meet a cute guy, we hit it off, and after a couple of dates, we start to tell our friends about him and all of his potential. But that's the thing, it's just potential.

There are things he does that bother you, but he really is cute and somewhat funny, although his jokes are a little immature.

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It's not gonna get better, and you shouldn't have to stay with a man in the hopes that he can mature and be ready for a real relationship.

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If he does these 14 things, he's way too immature to be in a relationship:

1. Ironically, the most immature people think that they’re really mature

They’re very good at judging others and pulling them down, but almost incapable of seeing faults in themselves. They’re in denial of their own weaknesses and are not willing to admit that they’re human and less than perfect just like everyone else.

2. Immature people deal with conflict or disagreement through aggressive means

They misunderstand empathy and compassion as weaknesses. They try to establish their superiority and authority over someone else by demeaning or insulting them. They are narrow-minded because they do not try to learn from and understand another person’s point of view.

3. Immature people react very negatively to perceived rejection or abandonment

They are very amicable when things are going their way, but as soon as they cannot control something, they are incapable of acting gracefully under pressure. They try to turn the tables around by acting like they rejected you, rather than accepting that everyone is entitled to their own opinion.

4. Immature people do not leave their comfort zones and resent those who do

They box themselves and other people into comfortable categories from which they never grow because it gives them a semblance of control. They stick to the familiar and the known in their social and professional life. This is also the reason that they are unable to deal with the uncertainty and the things they can’t control in their life.

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5. Immature people gaslight and blame others for their actions

They will abuse you, and act like they’re doing you a favor. They will take advantage of you, and victimize themselves. They will drag you down before you have the chance to expose their real selves to them. They prefer the company of people they consider inferior or that they are able to dominate. Since they care so much about their public image, they appear to be superficially perfect.

6. Immature people crave what they can’t have

Since their sense of self-worth is based on a false sense of self, it is dependent on external validation. When they can’t have something it proves a direct threat to their ego, which is incongruent with the way they see themselves. They are impatient, and cannot stand the denial of immediate gratification for their selfish needs and desires.

7. Immature people are materialistic and do not grasp the spiritual aspect of life

They work towards success in cookie-cutter professions and gain approval through awards and material possessions. They are empty and dissatisfied on the inside because they know that they do not possess the courage to push their boundaries, and actually do something meaningful with their lives.

8. Immature people never take responsibility

Whether in relationships or workplaces, it is never ever their fault. The reason they seem to be stuck in repetitive life patterns is that they cannot face the truth. They refuse to take accountability for their mistakes, falsely convincing themselves that other people or circumstances are the problems.

9. Immature people act juvenile and childish because they’re actually hiding massive insecurity behind a shadow of egotism

They haven’t taken the time to face their true selves, and keeping up the masks takes up all their energy.

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10. Immature people think that they’re different

They absolutely love the idea of being special. It gives them an excuse to elevate their own self-esteem. They have a sense of entitlement whether it’s through their skillset, talents, appearance, privileges, or personalities.

11. Immature people take everything personally

They get easily offended, as everything is a blow to their ego. They are so self-absorbed that they do not understand that the world does not revolve around them. They need the reassurance that they are the center of the universe.

12. Immature people do not respect healthy boundaries with other people

Such people pose the biggest threats to immature people because they are truly secure, and mirror their shadow selves back to them. Such people stand up to them and remind them that they are not always right, which takes away their sense of power.

13. Immature people see the world in black or white

They are unable to understand the subjectivity of human nature and see things from other perspectives. If you’re not with them, you’re against them; it’s all or nothing. They assume that their opinions, needs, and wants are the only ones that matter, and are very set in their ways.

14. Immature people are cowards

They pretend to have the roar of a lion with the heart of a mouse. They come in all shapes and sizes, from all ages and walks of life. The best way to recognize them is through the stench of their colossal ego reeking underneath the scent of their perfume.

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Nikita Mor is a freelance writer who covers lifestyle and relationship topics.

This article was originally published at Thought Catalog. Reprinted with permission from the author.