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(And then regrets it.)
By Christine Schoenwald — Written on Jul 05, 2017
Choosing a partner is one of the most difficult decisions any of us will ever have to make.
Do you go simply from your gut instincts? If they seem like they’re the perfect person to spend your life and make a family with, what are the chances that they will be? Do you just have to trust your feelings or do you try to go from a more practical point of view?
They seem responsible and have been there during tough times in the past, but since there’s no guarantee they’ll be there in the future, do you just have to gamble that they’ll come through for you?
We all grow and change and we hope that the way our partner changes will be in a way that we can handle or that is compatible with our own growth. You’ve heard the phrase, “They just grew apart.” Is there anything that you can do to prevent this?
People also tend to show their best selves when they’re at the beginning of a relationship, but what if they’re not presenting their true selves and you don’t find out all their ugly secrets and personality flaws until you’ve made a serious commitment?
Sometimes we’re blind to the flaws of others because we simply don’t want to see them or, if we do see them, we put a spin on them. “Oh, it’s not so bad," we say to ourselves, “I can live with it.” And yet 10 years down the line, you find that no, you really couldn't live with it.
Most of us aren’t psychic, so we can’t see the future, which is wonderful as it keeps a relationship interesting and surprising. Making a mistake, even if it’s about a person, can be a good thing if you treat it as a learning experience.
But when it comes to relationships, here's the kind of partner he chooses and why she may be the wrong girl, based on his zodiac sign.
ARIES (March 21 - April 19)
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Aries chooses someone who is constantly changing because he thinks he'll never get bored with them. The problem is that they're so flighty that they never can settle down and he never gets a clear sense of who they are or what they feel their purpose is. He needs someone who is lively and comfortable with change as long as they have an inner strength that never wavers. If they just change all the time, they're not growing, they're going through the motions and remaining childish and immature.
Read: The 13 Brutal Truths About Loving An Aries, As Written By One
TAURUS (April 20 - May 20)
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The worst mistake he can make when choosing a significant other is to find someone who doesn't stand up to him and takes a passive role in the relationship. Yes, Tauruses are stubborn and inflexible but that doesn't mean it's good or healthy for them to emotionally bully everyone in their lives. They need to be challenged sometimes and to have someone be as passionate about an issue as they are, especially if they're on completely opposite sides.
Read: The 5 Brutal Truths About Loving A Taurus, As Written By One
GEMINI (May 21 - June 20)
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The worst mistake he can make when choosing a partner is finding someone who is all talk but never follows through. It's great when someone talks a good game but if they don't have the talents or drive to back it up, they're never going to amount to anything. Gemini needs to not be blinded by good conversation and make sure that they not only can talk the talk but walk the walk.
Read: The 13 Brutal Truths About Loving A Gemini, As Written By One
CANCER (June 21 - July 22)
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The kind of partner he chooses is someone that caters to his every whim, subjugating their needs for his. Seriously, what's the fun in that? Cancer needs a partner, someone who has their own interests and goals, not someone who is just there to pamper and support him without having a life of their own.
Read: The 5 Brutal Truths About Loving A Cancer, As Written By One
LEO (July 23 - August 22)
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He can be superficial, so it's not surprising that the worst mistake he can make is choosing someone based purely on their looks. Look, obviously being attracted to a significant other is very important, but it's not enough to build an entire relationship on. Leo needs a partner in every sense of the word, someone who will share the journey with him.
VIRGO (August 23 - September 22)
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Virgos tend to do their research, so he might choose someone who looks great on paper but isn't right for him. She might have completely out there ideas about politics and other important issues that won't jive very well with his more conservative leanings. If he chooses someone thin-skinned, they're not going to react very well when he occasionally says something harsh and overly critical.
Read: 7 Brutal Truths About Loving A Virgo (As Written By A Virgo)
LIBRA (September 23 - October 22)
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Libras tend to be serial monogamists, so if there's an opening for a partner, he may fill it fast without fully thinking it out. They really don't enjoy being alone so sometimes they choose a warm body rather than waiting around for the right person to come along. Luckily, if it really doesn't work out, he'll have no problem ending it and finding someone new.
Read: 11 Brutal Truths About Loving A Libra, As Written By One
SCORPIO (October 23 - November 21)
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Since Scorpios aren't about one-night stands and f*ck buddies, a Scorpio man can be ruled by his penis. If he finds someone who does it for him in the bedroom, he might be hasty in trying to lock them down when they're really not a suitable partner. The Scorpio man will do everything in his power to force things to work out and if his partner leaves him, he'll continue to obsess about her for a long time.
Read: 14 Brutal Truths About Loving A Scorpio, As Written By One
SAGITTARIUS (November 22 - December 21)
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The Sagittarius man will hold out for someone who is okay with his taking off at a moment's notice and is fun enough to keep him interested. So yeah, his mistake is that he's not willing to compromise or look beyond the obvious. To say he has some commitment issues is an understatement. He needs to be convinced that he can be in a long-term relationship and not feel suffocated and tied down.
Read: 7 Brutal Truths About Loving A Sagittarius, As Written By One
CAPRICORN (December 22 - January 19)
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He tends to get serious fast and can make life-changing decisions before really getting to know the person. Does she have terrible credit? Is she constantly overdrawn? Does she want a family? These are important questions that Capricorn needs to know the answers to before he decides, but often he just rushes into a relationship without giving it the thought he'd give everything else that matters to him. That's the kind of partner he chooses.
Read: 7 Brutal Truths About Loving A Capricorn, As Written By One
AQUARIUS (January 20 - February 18)
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The worst mistake an Aquarius can make when choosing a partner is mistaking easy-going for lazy. He likes when people don't get up in his face and he especially likes it when his partner doesn't get overly emotional. But sometimes someone may appear to be laid back when really, they just don't want to expel any energy. He needs someone who is willing to fight for the underdog and wants to make change happen, not just waste their time binge-watching Netflix.
Read: 7 Brutal Truths About Loving An Aquarius, As Written By One
PISCES (February 19 - March 20)
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He may not admit to it but the Pisces man is a huge romantic. The trouble is that he can get carried away by a meet-cute scenario and suddenly believe that it's the romantic relationship that he's been dreaming of when it couldn't be further from the truth. A Pisces can be easily duped into believing that things are magical and cannot look beyond the facade. Love doesn't have to be 100 percent practical and realistic but it should at least have a little basis in reality.
Read: 7 Brutal Truths About Loving A Pisces, As Written By One