What Guys REALLY Think About Using Their Fingers On You During Foreplay

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Sex

They mean well, I swear.

I've already asked women how they feel about the age-old act of finger foreplay, also known as "fingering." And much to my surprise, some weren't nearly as excited as I thought they would be, but like with any foreplay — some women just weren't feeling it.

But when I asked six guys what it is about fingering a woman that appeals to them as men, they sort of won me over with their responses.

(Not that I was ever personally against it, but let's just say I get where both genders are coming from.)

As for the ladies, I think it all comes down to bad fingering experiences.

It's important to remember that bad sex is just a part of the dating game — you win some, you lose some — it's not fair but it is, unfortunately, part of life. 

That said, one nail biting, or should I say, nail clawing experience shouldn't be enough to make you give up on fingering.

These six men serve as a gentle reminder that when done right, fingering can be quite pleasurable — and for most of them that's all they're after ... YOUR pleasure.

(Seriously they're practicing on fruits.)

I think this type of foreplay opens the door for communication, which is what seems to be missing since so many (and by so many I mean too many) women could do without fingering.
 

Related: How Women Feel About Being Fingered (And How Guys Mess It Up)
 

The rare few guys who said they aren't exactly looking to please you are kind of looking out for themselves, but you'll see just what I mean.

The key is finding a guy who cares about your pleasure and will be open to feedback when he doesn't quite measure up to your expectations — like some of the gentlemen below — because believe me when I say they're the G.O.A.T.

Here are six men being blatantly honest about how they feel about fingering their women: 

 

1. The Wetter, the Better

"I have fingered every one of the 60+ women I have slept with: It is interesting, isn't it, that we finger a woman as part of foreplay?

I think part of the reason is that subconsciously, we are trying to see if there's anything strange inside, such as herpes sores or the like.

I think also that we are trying to see how wet she is. Obviously, the wetter she is, the more we feel that we are appealing to her. If she's totally dry, then it might mean she's not aroused, and on top of that, we might hurt her if we have intercourse with her." —Dan

 

2. Just Because 

"Because women like it." —Bill 


Related: How To Finger Yourself To Have Ridiculously Good Orgasms EVERY Time
 

3.  Whole Truth, Nothing But the Truth

"Being bluntly honest… it was the way I was shown and told to arouse. I am fortunate that all of the women I’ve been with have found it to be arousing.

Playing with the clitoris and inserting my fingers seemed to pleasure, both, them and me so I never stopped to consider if they liked it or not.

I thought it was the primary way to arouse a woman… besides oral stimulation, which is very good too for me." —Robert

 

4. If I Don't ... She Will

"Oh, that’s easy.  We do it because if we didn’t, women would be doing it to themselves. 

Most women when they masturbate start at the clit, but after a while, they dip one or two fingers (sometimes even more) down into themselves for a few strokes and then back out to the clit.

I have always found that the best way to turn a woman on is to watch what she likes to do to herself and then copy it. " —Phil


Related: 7 Basic (But Sexy AF) Tricks To Make Her Orgasm With Your Hands
 

5. Finger Testing 101

"It's called the finger test. Before we go any further I finger a woman to see if there are any weird odors I should know about, but obviously, this is not every woman." —Marcus
 

6. It's Not Fingering, It's Good Foreplay

"I believe using my hands to stimulate a woman is a very important part of foreplay and lovemaking, but I wouldn't even call it fingering, which does conjure up thoughts of nervous high school experimentation. I can't think of a lover who would characterize it as weird or unnecessary — if it is done properly. 

It's just part of an overall highly enjoyable experience. I believe it enhances the overall experience and provides enjoyment beyond that typically possible solely through intercourse or oral stimulation. Here are a few reasons:

  • Women have different types of orgasms (despite potential disagreement by so-called "researchers"), and certain of those types require stimulation that is sometimes best provided by one or more fingers, especially G-spot orgasms and squirting orgasms.
  • With his hand a man can stimulate multiple areas at once, so with one hand the clit, the G-spot, the vaginal walls, and the anus (if she is comfortable with that) can all be manipulated.  
  • When a woman uses her hand or a vibrator to masturbate, the clit can become desensitized, which can require greater stimulation to bring her to orgasm than can be easily applied through intercourse or oral.  
  • Lubrication is important, and the vagina is a good source of lubricant for the fingers to provide stimulation to other areas, like the clit and the nipples.
  • From what I have learned, orgasmic meditation is a technique that primarily (solely?) uses the fingers to provide stimulation.
     

If you think about it, typically a woman masturbates by using her fingers, perhaps more by rubbing her clit than by penetration, and perhaps helped by a vibrator, but usually, fingers are involved.  If a woman is of the opinion that being fingered is unnecessary, then maybe she is unusually sensitive and it is uncomfortable for her, but most likely she has never had someone properly touch her with his hands." —Brett

 

Related: 6 Of The Dirtiest, CRAZIEST Fruit-Fingering Videos On The Internet

 

Overall, I think it's difficult for us women to separate fingering from the juvenile stuff we were doing in high school so we forget that it can be really good foreplay, if and when the man doing it cares and thinks it through in the way that these men have done.

Or, didn't you see the power point presentation from Brett right above?

 

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