Never wonder again.
As a relationship expert, I have worked diligently to uncover which types of men are simply a spring fling and which are the real thing. Be sure to take notes, as they will help you figure out the answer to the question: is it love?
Spring Fling guys:
1. The Sporty Guy
He asks you to meet him somewhere that he can check out your body like the gym or the beach. This could indicate he wants to check out your wares rather than be a gentleman who cares.
I was once asked to meet a man at the Sports Club L.A. where he was just finished working out so we could go on a hike in the Santa Monica mountains. After attempting to keep up with him climbing a precipitous incline where he didn’t speak to me once (and I couldn’t speak due to heart palpitations and hyperventilation), I reached the top, thinking now we might have a chat... only to witness him turn around and run back down the hill. Perhaps he wasn’t impressed by my gams?
2. The "I Was Just In The Neighborhood" Guy
He won’t make concrete plans to meet you but will hit you up when he’s near your house, usually right around the time you’re getting ready for bed. Let’s say it together: booty call!
3. The "I Want You All To Myself" Guy
Meeting his friends or your friends or any other humans either of you know will just get in the way of how much he loves hanging out with just you in your apartment on nights and weekends. Why go out when you can be alone together and he can pretend you don’t exist anywhere else?
4. The "You're The Only Woman I've Told" Guy
You have never connected with a man the way you connected with this man on the very first date. You learned all about his ex-con stepdad, how his mom drank Thunderbird, that he lost his virginity to his middle school choir teacher, that women have never understood him... that is until he met you. Be wary of the over-sharers; they often disappear as fast as they confess.
5. The "You Wish He'd Close His Mouth And Take Off His Clothes" Guy
I once dated an actor from The Bold and the Beautiful who kept trying to invite me to something called a “Spiritual Bleed.” Whatever the hell that was. I wanted him to stop talking and just kiss me!
But these guys? These men are the real thing:
1. The Gentleman
He takes you somewhere relaxed and fun where you’ll have the opportunity to talk. My husband took me to see his favorite Charlie Chaplin movie, City Lights, at a revival cinema house because we’d met in film school at UCLA. Then we went out for dinner to discuss our shared passion.
2. The "A Kiss Goodnight Is All You'll Get On The First Date" Guy
Sure you might be open for more, but a kiss is all he offers. Then he asks if he can call you tomorrow to set up another date. You go inside, lean against the door and feel the butterflies doing a happy dance.
3. The Guy Who Steps Up
4. The "I Still Want To See You" Guy
It doesn’t matter if Flo’s come to town, you have the flu or resting bitch face or shingles. He just feels better when you’re together.
5. The Non-Doormat
Sometimes we ladies like to see what we can get away with. You know he’s a keeper when he calls you on your sh*t and has some self-respect. You want a nice guy, not a doormat.
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This article was originally published at Huffington Post. Reprinted with permission from the author.