OK, so they don't stand when you walk in the room ...
Do I expect to be paid the same amount as a man for doing the same job? Yes.
This doesn't make me any less weak-kneed when the man I love opens my car door.
What can I say? I'm an enigma.
It's hard to find real chivalry in this modern world of ours, but I absolutely think it still exists. It has just changed.
Nowadays you aren't likely to find a man willing to stand when you enter a room or doff his cap at you when passing on the street, but that doesn't mean chivalry as we know it is gone.
If you doubt me, here are 12 solid signs that your dude practices modern chivalry!
1. He stores your nudes in a photo vault app — that he PAID for!
Chivalry means paying for apps to protect the honor of your lady love.
2. He never just texts you "hey".
A man who believes in chivalry believes in using all of his words.
3. He buys you tampons — sure, he uses self-checkout, but still.
A truly chivalrous man doesn't just acknowledge that you bleed out of your vagina, he helps you with said bleeding.
4. He washes the underwear you left in his bed.
Get this, he used the delicate cycle and everything.
5. He remembers the anniversary of the first time you had a threesome.
And he celebrates it by planning another threesome.
6. He buys batteries for your vibrator without being asked.
A man who practices modern chivalry notices the little things about you and your sex toys.
7. He lets you have the first laptop at the strip club.
Chivalry does mean ladies first, after all.
8. He only watches porn starring women who look just like you.
It only gets weird when it's two women who look like you and they start making out.
9. He says thank you for all the awesome blowjobs you give by cooking you homemade pancakes.
The really funny part is that you LIKE giving blowjobs, not that you'll tell him that, because, pancakes.
10. He gets that tattoo of his ex-girlfriend's removed from his butt.
Chivalry, they name is lasers burning off ass-ink.
11. He saves you in his phone as "Dat Ass Tho."
Few things are more chivalrous than an ardent admiration for your booty.
12. He picks "true love" as your safe word.
Because nothing says chivalry like some playing around with restraints.