Quotes, Entertainment And News

13 HILARIOUS Lea DeLaria Quotes That Prove She's A Total LGBT Hero

believe in homosexuality lea delaria quote

Name five butch lesbians, quick! Just off the top of your head.

I will wait.

...

Chances are, unless you’re a lesbian yourself, you can’t do that.

Why not?

It’s not because there aren’t a lot of butch girls out in the world, but because there are few images of women society is more uncomfortable with than the butch lesbian.

Why? Because men are generally in power in the media, politics and pretty much everything else.

And men tend to promote two categories of people: Those they relate to, and those they desire.

Femme lesbians? Lately they're everywhere. And that's great. 

But it's not because there are so many more so-called "lipstick lesbians". 

It's because straight dudes LOVE femme lesbians and bisexual women.

It’s a well-known fact that a lot of straight dudes live to fetishize women having sex with other women (whether we want them to or not).

That’s why Lea DeLaria’s rising fame (and recent SAG award win with her Orange Is The New Black castmates) is huge for queer women everywhere.


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Lea is an unapologetic dyke, a word she uses to describe herself, even to the chagrin of her mother, who is famed to have asked Lea why she can’t just be a “nice lesbian” (because I'm a big dyke! she replied) in a world that wants to hide away anyone who is at all "gender messy".

And why should Lea apologize for calling herself what she wants? She’s 58 years-old, and that means she’s lived through some SERIOUSLY hostile times for LGBT folks, and has risen to prominence as a comedian and actor being exactly who she is. A dyke! A very, very funny dyke.

But if you’re not queer, that overt, butch queerness mean not much to you.

But if you are, you understand why seeing someone like Lea on TV or in a movie is so important. Because heteronormativity dictates what all couples should look like (straight, or at least a very “sanitized” version of gay), you never get to see yourself or your friends.

Not all lesbians are going to identify with Portia DiRossi (a.k.a. Ellen’s wife) or even Ellen herself.

Some lesbians are foul-mouthed, brassy, fearless, and totally disinterested in appealing to the mainstream.

That’s why we love Lea DeLaria so much.

She is fucking fearless. And she’s not worried about upsetting the delicate sensibilities of straight guys. She even told Conan O’Brien (notoriously easy to make blush) that she lost 50lbs by only eating p*ssy.

Twenty years ago, this joke could never have been made on network TV (even with the requisite "bleeping"). Probably not even ten years ago!

At least not by a lesbian.

So thank you, Lea. From all the queer girls in the world who know that more representation of the wide variety of REAL women will help raise a generation of healthier, happier women. And yes, those foul-mouthed jokes may even someday save a life.

In honor of our LGBT hero, here are 13 funny-as-hell Lea DeLaria quotes we just HAD to share.

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If you're searching for the best quotes and memes to share with the people you love (or just want to feel inspired yourself) ... look no further! From the sweetest love quotes, inspirational sayings, and hilarious relationship truths, we've got you covered.

Author's note: Support The Trevor Project, a super cool suicide and crisis hotline for LGBTQ+ teens and young people. If you are an LGBTQ+ teen in trouble or need help, please reach out. The Trevor Project is free and will help you find hope. <3. Call 866-488-7386 for free, anytime. 

She's here, she's queer, get used to it. Or don't. Doesn't matter to her.

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"What do you mean you don't believe in homosexuality? It's not like the Easter Bunny, your belief isn't necessary." —Lea DeLaria

Don't expect Lea DeLaria to apologize for being sexy.

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"Straight girls like me. They flirt with me to get whatever they want. Of course it works." —Lea DeLaria

Bet you never thought of this one!

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"It’s been my thing to try to figure out what to call a group of lesbians, you know, like a gaggle of geese. I think it’s a 'lick.' A 'lick' of lesbians." —Lea DeLaria

Evidence that Lea DeLaria will stand up for the rights of all LGBT folks, out or not.

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"No one has the responsibility to be out to anyone but himself or herself. I made my choice a million years ago." —Lea DeLaria

 

Lea DeLaria is NOT afraid of making an "eating p*ssy" joke ... and doesn't care if you're offended.

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"They told me I have diabetes, high blood pressure and high cholesterol … so basically all I can eat is p*ssy." —Lea DeLaria

 

The sad but (somehow unexpected) truth of girls who like girls.

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"It's a cosmic joke that I'm a lesbian, because I understand men so well but women are a complete mystery to me." —Lea DeLaria

 

Lea DeLaria isn't afraid to call out hypocrisy when she sees it.

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"They are preserving the sanctity of marriage, so that two gay men who've been together for twenty-five years can't get married, but a guy can still get drunk in Vegas and marry a hooker at the Elvis chapel." —Lea DeLaria

 

Her boldness is what makes Lea DeLaria so damn funny.

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"My idea as far as comedy goes has always been to push the limits of what's acceptable for a woman to do or say or be." —Lea DeLaria

 

She's not going to let some random bro define her worth.

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"He looked me right in the face and said, 'You fucking bulldyke!' And I thought to myself, Oooh, what a smart man! Why, I'll bet he took one look at me and knew I was white, too!" ―Lea DeLaria

 

Exactly why Lea DeLaria is an LGBT hero.

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"I've been an advocate for queer people my entire life. I've been a professional lesbian for 33 years, and what's important now that I've leaped into the mainstream – I was moderately famous, now I'm kind of worldwide famous – all I've ever wanted to do is change the world and get laid." —Lea DeLaria

 

Lea DeLaria ... changing the world and getting laid.

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"[An anti-abortion conference goer] says, 'Well, don't you believe that life begins at inception?' I say, 'No. I believe that life begins when you mind your own fucking business!'" –Lea DeLaria

 

A universal truth for all people. Ever.

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"Never point at anything beige and call it cool." —Lea DeLaria

Nothing wrong with being a big dyke, right?!

Photo: GO Magazine
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"My mother said to me, 'Why do you have to call yourself a dyke? Why can't you be a nice lesbian?' 'Because I'm not a nice lesbian, I'm a big dyke!'" –Lea DeLaria