One of the best ways to really get an idea of who a person is, is by looking at their friends. Whether we like to admit it or not, we pick up our friends’ habits, ways of speech, as well as values.
If you see a guy who has friends who hit their girlfriends, you should back away from him because chances are he’ll do the same. But sometimes, subtler signs are hard to notice until you look at who his friends are. If he only hangs out with women, you need to be careful.
Here’s why this friendship pattern is a yellow flag at the very least — and why you should avoid men with no male friends.
1. There’s often a reason why men won’t hang out with other guys.
Guys, in particular, tend to try to excuse other guys’ behavior because they don’t tend to hold one another to the same high standards as girls do. If guys avoid a certain guy, it’s often because they did something pretty terrible.
Usually, it takes something like sleeping with a friend’s wife or stealing to have guys avoid you if you’re male. Do you really want to date a guy like that?
2. Most guys need bro time.
There. I said it. Just like most women need to have at least one female friend who they can go shopping with or drink wine with, guys have to have bros who they can do things with.
There are certain things they just can’t discuss with girls for one reason or another. If they can’t have someone to vent to, that might end up reflecting in your relationship further on.
3. Not wanting to talk to men also tends to be an indicator of internalized misandry.
Much of the time, refusing to talk to guys says a lot about his stance on men. If he has a lot of disdain for men, you have to wonder what makes him hate his own gender so much. Like a lack of bro time, this issue can end up cropping up in your relationship with him.
4. Guys who have almost entirely female groups of friends often aren’t actually just friends with all of them.
I’ve dated a few guys who had almost exclusively female friends and have noticed that most of the time, this is a thinly veiled way to be a player. In other words, guys who are like this often have girls who want to have sex with him or date him. Moreover, they usually are aware of this even if they say they’re not.
If you get this vibe or feel like most girls are just there to score a chance with him, you may want to rethink dating this dude. It’s often not worth the drama.
5. In some cases, it’s also a sign that he's lying to you about something major.
True story, one of my exes had lied to other women about our relationship status. It ends up that he was dating three of his “friends” at the same time. Just be aware that this could happen.
6. If you break up, people will believe him over you.
In many cases, this issue goes hand in hand with the other two points I just made. Guys who have a ton of female friends often will have the rumor mill tearing his exes to shreds.
7. To a point, you may also have a problem with your own confidence.
Even the most secure woman will have moments where she’ll get nervous if her guy is constantly surrounded by women. It’s a hard issue that will make you struggle, and truthfully, not all women can handle that. This is why having all female friends and no make friends is sometimes a deal-breaker for girls.
8. You may end up finding his female friends don’t like you, and will try to stir up drama with you.
In some cases, guys who have exclusively female friend groups may have a person that his friends want to see him end up with. If you aren’t that person, drama might ensue. Once again, this doesn’t always happen, but it’s something to watch for.
9. There may be moments where he starts comparing you to female friends.
I’ve noticed that guys who have no male friends do this fairly often, especially if he’s had crushes on some of his friends in the past. If he starts doing this, your “yellow” flag just turned bright red.
10. Having a guy who has no guy friends often can indicate that he doesn’t have any real friends at all...and that’s usually a bold red flag.
Are you sure his female friends are really friends or do they just hang around with him because they feel bad or don’t know how to get away? While guys are bolder and willing to cut things off quickly, girls often are worried about saying no in fear of retaliation. If he has no friends, one really has to wonder why.