"Accidentally farting during sex."
We all have our anxieties. Does he like us? Do we look OK? Are we on the same page?
That's all true with just the dating and meeting part of things, but when it comes to sex, there's a whole other bunch of weird anxieties that come into play. Will it be any good? Will I do anything to embarrass myself? Does this position make my ass look fat? Are my boobs flopping everywhere? Will his penis be too small? Too big? What if I fart? What if we're just not sexually compatible?
The worries never end from the first time we hook up with someone, and even if we do it time and again, that sexual anxiety may stay. We asked a bunch of women to share their sexual anxieties and you'll find a lot of them to be very familiar.
1. I hope I don't queef.
"I concentrate so hard on NOT farting during sex that it literally takes over my ability to have good sex."
2. Did I take my pill?
"Getting pregnant... Does that count?"
3. Is his penis going to be too small?
"When I really like someone, I convince myself that he's going to have a micro-penis and it's not going to work out. I'm usually wrong, but I've been right before and it makes me so anxious about having sex for the first time."
4. Am I tight enough?
"I always worry about being 'tight' down there, even though no one has ever complained and I've actually been told the opposite. I do my Kegels religiously!"
5. Will I be able to finish?
"My biggest sexual anxiety is fearing I will not be able to orgasm (I have an easier time on my own than I do with my partner). I then fear that I'm taking too long to climax and that the other person may get annoyed/bored."
6. Do I smell OK?
"I worry about whether or not I smell or taste OK (I blame Sex and the City)."
7. Are my nipples lactating?
"I worry that my nipples will leak while he's sucking on them or that he'll think my labia are too short. Is that a thing? Short, stubby labia? Are all lips sexy? Sigh..."
8. Is there more?
"I wonder if there's an orgasm out there that I haven't found yet/discovered. Like, I know I've had an orgasm and I can tell the difference between 'finishing' and 'really finishing', but is there some magical unicorn orgasm that everyone is experiencing but I'm not? It's so hard to describe what an orgasm is that I feel like we don't actually know what someone else is having... know what I mean?"
9. Who farted?
"I definitely fear accidentally farting during sex. But hey, if it's odorless you can say it was queefing! (Not that I know from experience or anything...)"
10. Oh god, I hope I don't poop.
"Ever since my friend pooped while having sex, I'm terrified of pooping while having sex."
11. Did I lock the door?
"My biggest fear is that my kids will walk into the room when we are having sex. I triple check to lock the door before we even start, and even sometimes when I'm into it, I'll suddenly worry that the door is unlocked and make one of us go check it again to be sure. Thankfully, no one has ever walked in on us."