Love can be terrifying.
From the moment we’re born we need love, and that need for love never goes away. We want to be loved by our family, friends, and anyone else we have a connection with.
We dream of finding the one when we’re young and do what we can to be attractive. We do all kinds of things searching for our perfect partner from looking our best to dating on our best behavior.
However, you may just be afraid of love.
It seems as if the world has been paired up, and that to truly belong we must be part of a couple. But the truth is being single can be just as fulfilling (if not more so) than having a partner. You shouldn't be desperate to find someone and should strive towards being comfortable with yourself before you commit to another person.
There are times when we’re just not in a good space to be with someone. We may be happy on our own and don’t need anyone else. You may have been in a relationship that ended badly and you need to be careful, or maybe your relationship was practically perfect and everyone you meet just doesn’t measure up.
There could be a ton of reasons that you’re not open to being in a relationship, and many of those reasons may be emotional or psychological.
Our relationships and even our lack of relationships help shape our personalities, and the thought of letting down your guard and loving again doesn’t seem likely to you. If you’re scared to love, you may show it in ways that even you are unaware of.
You may think that you’re open to love but the truth is you’re not ready at all. As much as we may want love, it can be a frightening thing to open yourself up to another person.
Here’s how you show that you’re too afraid to love, based on your zodiac sign.
When you're afraid of love you just make yourself unbelievably busy. You're always active but this takes it to a new level: work, fun, fitness, projects — anything that will occupy your mind and let you not think about anything but what you're doing.
When you're in a scared of love space, you get extremely guarded. There's often a wall up as you tend to only let people get only so close, and then after they've proved themselves trustworthy, you might let them get closer... but that rarely happens.
You show your love fear by using Tinder or Bumble or any other app. The attention of possible dates makes you feel good, but you have no intention of following up with a face-to-face date. When you have a screen in front of you, you feel safe and put your amazing communication skills to good use, but you're not interested in meeting them in person.
Instead of focusing on how incredible you are, you tell yourself that no one could love you because you're unlovable. You go through the list of how people have failed you and how, in a small way, you deserved it.
It may appear that you're just very picky and that no one can measure up to your high standards, but the truth is you're just scared that they might see that you're not spectacular and are just as flawed as everybody else.
If someone's interested in you, you'll do a full investigation (including their social media) of them, searching for evidence on how there's something wrong with them for wanting you. If that doesn't work, you'll work even harder proving how you're all wrong for them.
You tell yourself that you don't want to commit because there could be somebody better out there and you don't want to be stuck with someone who isn't absolutely perfect for you. The truth is you'll never find anyone perfect, and even if you did, you wouldn't be able to see how great they are; your fear of love would be blocking your view.
When you're terrified that you might fall in love, you focus on a past relationship and get consumed with thoughts about your ex. You can be obsessive and if you're constantly thinking about them, there's no head space for anyone new.
You show that you're scared to love by hiding your true personality and becoming someone you're not. You lie about your likes and dislikes, and you tend to completely lose yourself in the false persona that you present. Be careful that you don't hide your true self so well that you forget who you are.
When you have a fear of love, you pretend that you're so strong, have no vulnerability, and can come off as cold. You're afraid they won't like the real you and you try to be someone you're not. Unfortunately, when you pretend to be something you're not, you get extremely uncomfortable and nervous which convinces you to just give up.
You normally like to be around people, but when you've had your heart broken one too many times, you get fearful. When you're afraid of love, your plan of action is just to say no to dates or anything that could lead to something more. If you slip and say yes, you secretly pray that they'll cancel.
You're so busy fantasizing about the perfect partner or the best romantic scenarios that you don't put yourself out there. Why should you? The fantasy world in your head is everything you could ever want. You're scared that you'll never find someone who gets you, but in the world of your imagination, you have your pick of thousands of Mr. Rights.