Outrageous Celebrity Sex Stories Too Hot To Be Real (Literally)

Photo: WeHeartIt 
Sex

They're as sexy as they are hilariously bad.

If you're looking for sex stories to read, the internet is full of them.

Like, full to the point where Google might explode if you just type "sex stories" into the search bar. 

It doesn't matter what you're looking for.

If you can dream it, someone on the internet probably has written a sex story about it.

From personal confessions to fictional imaginings, the internet is the go-to place if you want to get your sexy on old-school style, by reading a sexy story. 

Ever wondered what it would be like to lose your virginity to Harry Styles? Or how about having James Marsden teach you how to properly spank Zac Efron? 

Yes, there are celebrity fan fiction erotic stories about everyone, from Justin Bieber, Orlando Bloom and Miley Cyrus (whom you don't have to work too hard to imagine naked) to buttoned-up people like Condoleeza Rice and Louis CK. 

These (obviously totally fictional) erotic sex stories about celebrities penned by the fans who love them will transform the way you look at your favorite celebrities forever.

Hang on to your butts, it's about to get sexual in here! 

 

Celebrity: Beyonce

Title: Beyonce's Book of Bitches 

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Summary: After going to bed early one night while Jay-Z is out on tour, Beyonce finds herself too horny to sleep. To help ease the pain, she flips through the giant photo book of conquests she keeps beside her bed. First up? Britney Spears. 

Excerpt: "Despite all the times she had seen and abused it, Beyonce still found herself licking her lips at the sight of Britney's ass on display before her. She absolutely adores seeing a woman in such a vulnerable and submissive position... on all fours like a bitch... ass just waiting to be abused."

 

Celebrity: Hilary Duff

Title: Incest Pregnancy: Hilary Duff

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Summary: Like you might have guessed from the title, this one is all about Hilary Duff getting knocked up by her brother. Only (TWIST) YOU THE READER are her brother. Scandal abounds. Also I need to clean out my browser history like immediately. 

Excerpt:  "HD: I've taken care of you a lot more than mom and dad have. After I've grown up, I started having these feelings and urges. I couldn't find anyone to satisfy me, and that's when I realized I won't be unless it was you.

She helps you out of your shirt, and then helps you out of your pants. Your erection slips out of your underwear, she reaches and gets a firm grip on your big cock."

 

Celebrity: Orlando Bloom 

Title: The Witches of Canterbury 

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Summary: A coven of witch abducts Orlando Bloom and do sex things to him. Also witch things.

Excerpt: "Moonblossom placed both her hands on his chest and looked him in the eyes. Her eyes were light and playful. Without thinking, Orlando leaned forward and kissed her gently. She wrapped her arms around him and he could feel her naked breasts against his chest. She ran her fingers through his hair and thrust her tongue into his mouth. It felt warm and wet. Orlando had his eye closed but he heard the other two girls coming closer and he could feel more hands on his body now. Someone was rubbing his back and someone else was nibbling his ear. He moaned in pleasure. Moonblossom pulled away and he whimpered in disappointment."

 

Celebrities: Craig Ferguson and Conan O'Brien 

Title: Late Night in L.A. 

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Summary: Late night talk show hosts Conan and Craig are lovers. They do what lovers do. And also discuss just how challenging it is to be kings of late night. You know, the usual. 

Excerpt: "Craig's hands were soon on him again, moving around to his back and pulling him close. He leaned in, pressing his face to Conan's neck and inhaling the faint hint of aftershave that lingered there, along with Conan's own natural musk. Too turned on to stay in one spot for long, Craig began to nibble at the heated skin, moving lower to kiss the top of a lightly freckled shoulder." 

 

Celebrities: Zack Efron, James Marsden, and Brittany Snow 

Title: Threesome 

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Summary: Zack Efron, James Marsden, and Brittany Snow have a threesome after the Hairspray premiere party. As one does. Basically, also James Marsden is a kind of evil sex-teacher? I love it.

Excerpt: "He wrapped an arm around the boy and held the two young ones close on the ride back to Brittany's apartment. They walked up in silence and when the door was shut safely behind them, James pulled Zac close and slid his finger under the knot of his tie. Zac's breath was ragged and he felt Brittany move behind him, sliding her arms up his sides to his jacket, slowly pulling it off his frame. James smelled musky and Brittany smelled so sweet and he was ready to pass out right then and there. He wasn't even sure how he ended up in Brittany's bedroom, but he had and he was naked, painfully aware of it. Brittany was nuzzling his erect cock happily as James undressed."

 

Celebrity: Harry Styles 

Title: Rock Me 

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Summary: An awkward teenage virgin named Meg swears not to fall for the new playboy student at her high school, Harry Styles. Then she does. A lot. Also Liam Payne is there, presumably as Harry's one true love. To be honest I don't know, I didn't finish it. 

Excerpt: "'OMG! Its harry styles!' a blonde girl said. Yes! Its Harry Edward Styles. Known as the most popular boy and the playboy in our school. Don't get me wrong but he is in the same year as me but gets the lowest grade in math. I know."

 

Title: 30 Day Boyfriend 

Celebrity: Justin Bieber

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Summary: Parvati hates Justin Bieber (understandable). But he loves her. She bets he can't date her for a whole 30 days (a solid trope, I've got to say). He's like "YES I CAN". This one's special because it's written in the first person as Justin Bieber, poet warrior king.

Excerpt: "This girl had long hair that nested on top of her head in a wave of brown. She had big blue, dark eyes and had clear skin and I could see faint moles that speckled her face, mostly near her cheek area. She was gorgeous and stunning, to say the least."

 

Title: Jasmine's Lovely Pet 

Celebrity: Princess Jasmine from Disney's Aladdin 

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Summary: Princess Jasmine just wants to take a soothing bath, but her tiger Rajah has other ideas. That's right guys, we're closing out this round up with full on tiger sex. If you can dream it, the internet will write it. 

Excerpt: "She thought back to last night, to the feel of Rajah's enormous tongue stroking up and down her trembling womanhood. It had been the most earth shattering orgasm of her entire life. But it could NEVER happen again." 

 

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