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Not looking at yourself honestly can lead to a lifetime of loneliness.
By Ossiana Tepfenhart — Last updated on Apr 11, 2023
Have you ever met someone who seemed to think that the world revolves around them? Surely, we’ve all met the real-life equivalent of Willy Wonka’s Violet Beauregarde at one point or another.
Though we all do deserve to be treated with dignity and respect, sometimes we have to look at ourselves and wonder if we’re asking too much. Because the fact is that acting entitled and having an entitlement complex has serious repercussions.
What is an entitlement complex?
Entitlement is a narcissistic personality trait described as a sense of deservingness when nothing has been done to earn any special treatment. An entitlement complex means the person functions on the "you owe me" mentality, even when they have done very little to earn anything.
More often than not, it leads people who have these issues to live very lonely lives filled with regret. They often suffer from depression and can’t figure out why no one likes them.
The causes of an entitlement complex aren't definitively known. However, many researchers believe it could be caused by how people are treated by their parents and other authority figures, messages from the media, and other life events, especially those that make people feel they are special.
Here are 14 signs of an entitlement complex, and how to know if you suffer from one.
1. You have been known to shout, scream, and threaten people until they give you preferential treatment.
This is a key marker of someone who has never learned that they aren’t entitled to be treated like a special princess.
People who do this are often hated by the very people who serve them and typically don’t realize how disgusting their behavior is. If you regularly moan and bludgeon your way into getting what you want, you’re a horrible human being.
2. People generally don’t stay friends with you long.
One of the most common reasons that people drop friends is because they feel like the friend is a user, or that the friend acts entitled to way more than they actually should receive. If you regularly find yourself alone, you need to realize you’re probably the reason why.
3. If you were honest, the demands you put on others are unrealistic.
You know you’re asking for a lot. In fact, you know you’re asking for way too much — more than you yourself would ever be willing to provide. If this sounds familiar, you need to get help. You have entitlement issues.
4. You’ve been called a bully, manipulative, and a liar by many people.
This is because people with entitlement issues *are* bullies. Sadly, most of them don’t realize it. This is why many people who have entitlement issues are diagnosed as narcissists later on in life.
5. If you don’t get what you want, you will throw a tantrum or act out melodramatically just to gain attention from others.
Woe is the person who says no to you, for they will be the target of a major smear campaign. When you don’t get what you want, you will be the first one to let the whole world know that a grave injustice has been made.
If this sounds like you, the world has news for you: You’re not special and you probably deserve to hear “no” more often.
6. You punish people when they don’t do what you want.
Let’s say someone still said no despite all the threats you gave. Did you go out of your way to punish said person via gossip, abuse, or silent treatments? If so, you’re an entitled person who needs to look at yourself.
7. People have told you that you have double standards.
In most cases, you probably already know you have double standards. The thing is, this really isn’t okay. Would you want to be judged that way?
8. You offend people with what you say... a lot.
Most entitled people do this and don’t care who they hurt. In many cases, they may even go out of their way to be offensive just so they can make sure people know “they’re the dominant one here.”
9. You think you’re better than others and that being better means you deserve better.
No, you’re not. Your s*** does, in fact, stink. Go to counseling and start talking, because you have issues that are going to bite you in the butt eventually.
10. You love the idea of 'asserting your dominance.'
Don’t ask me why, but people who have a need to dominate things often have major entitlement issues as well. If you love exerting power over people, you probably have to think about why. You might find that it’s a sign that you need serious help.
11. You're selfish.
If you have an entitlement complex, you always have your needs taken care of first. You must be the person to order first, to be served first, or to be greeted first. You won't give a single thought to others until you have been satisfied, and even then you may not care.
12. You require constant praise.
People with an entitlement complex thrive on praise and being told they are great. If you haven't been given any praise in a day, you become agitated and grumpy. You feel like you should be praised because of how special you believe you are.
13. You're not grateful for what you have.
You believe you deserve more than you get. You won't say thank you for gifts or favors because you believe you deserved it and a thank you isn't needed. You're extremely greedy and often take your friendships for granted.
14. Rules don't apply to you.
You think rules were made for lesser people to help them stay in line, but rules don't apply to you because you are perfect. You are above the law and can do or say anything you want. This is how many people with an entitlement complex think.
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Ossiana Tepfenhart is a writer based out of Red Bank, New Jersey whose work has been featured in Yahoo, BRIDES, Your Daily Dish, Newtheory Magazine, and others. Follow her on Twitter for more.