You're Too Afraid Of Being Alone To Realize You Already Are

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Heartbreak, Self

Time for a reality check.

Too often I see people in relationships for the wrong reasons, and one the big ones is that they are afraid of being alone

Not having that person to rely on for emotional support and happiness can feel overwhelming if it's what you're used to having. But here's the thing: the wrong relationship makes you feel just as alone. 

You might not be alone in the sense that you're technically in a relationship, but if the only reason you're with someone is to feel like you're with someone, then you're probably lonelier than you would be if you were single


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In bad relationships I've been in, the main problem was always that the guy was never there for me when I needed him to be. One glaring example that comes to mind is when my last boyfriend told me something upsetting, and when I got upset he didn't come to check on me for three days. 

Three days.

That, my friends, is way more lonely than being single

When you're single, you're more likely to develop awesome friendships with people who don't mind bugging the crap out of you to make sure you're okay. You get closer to your family because there isn't pressure for them to like the person you're with. And most importantly, you learn how to make yourself feel better when you do feel lonely. You're also more likely to adopt some pets — and they really do help. 

If you're desperately holding on to a relationship because you're afraid of being alone, think about the last time you felt really lonely. Were you single or with somebody?

The weird thing is people can make us feel lonelier than just being by ourselves can; it's their reactions and behaviors that make us feel unwanted.

So if you're struggling to get over that fear, remind yourself: you've already been alone. For as long as you've realized this relationship wasn't right, you've been alone. And you survived it.


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Now, imagine your life alone, but without all the drama and heartache that the person you're with is causing you to have. I bet it looks a lot more fun and relaxing, right?

Being alone means having more control over your time and your life. It's something to embrace — not be afraid of. 

 

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