4 Ways To Know If Love Will Last (That Have NOTHING To Do With Sex)

Photo: weheartit
You probably haven't thought of these...
Love, Sex

You probably haven't thought of these...

So you've just started having sex with someone new. 

Congratulations! That's awesome as heck.

May you have many excellent orgasms worthy of journaling about in the sex journal that you probably keep in your bedside drawer.

You might be thinking that this new sexual chemistry is leading to a brilliant, long-lasting romantic relationship.

And maybe (just maybe!) you're right. 

BUT (you knew that was coming) sexual compatibility is not the only measure of how successful your relationship will be. 

There are four other very important areas where you need to be compatible in order for you to know that your relationship is going to last. 

Now remember, compatible doesn't mean perfect matches. It means being flexible enough to appreciate another person's worldview or way of life. 

And now, away we go! 

 

1. Religion 

You might not be a practicing a religion right now, but you might have when you were growing up and that might have more impact on your dating life than your sex life ever could. 

I'm not saying that you and the person you're hoping to form a long lasting relationship have to come from the same religious background, but you need to be on the same page in terms of what role faith is going to play in your relationship.

If you are both atheists, great, but if you plan on having kids, it's best to know if you plan on atheism for your kids as well, or helping them explore religion on their own terms. 

If you are both religious but come from different faiths, can you successfully understand and respect the other person's religious practices?

I know, I'm starting heavy, but I'm starting heavy for a reason. 

You want to get serious with this person, so address the serious issues. 

You don't have to believe the same things, but you need to be able to respect the other person's beliefs or else it's going to create conflict somewhere down the line. 

WeHeartIt

 

2. Family 

What's your relationship with your family like? What's their relationship with their family like?

Do you expect your family to play a major role in your daily life, whereas he is more special occasions only when it comes to interacting with his family?

These are things that will be good for you to figure out as your relationship evolves.

You might not want to think "family" immediately about the person you're having sex with, but it will come to factor in if the relationship continues. 

How he interacts with his own family and with your own can be a good indication of how he will behave if you two decide to get married and make your own family. 

Speaking of which, if having children is important to you, it's good to establish early on that he's looking for the same thing. If not, heartbreak could be inevitable. 

 

3. Politics 

When you first get together, it might be hot to discover that you have different political beliefs.

You can get into riotous political debates that wind up with both of you red-faced, stripping off your clothes and having hot, passionate, angry sex!

Well, angry sex is all well and good (as is the tender makeup sex that will surely follow) but if you two are leading lives that are directly in opposition eventually the angry sex will fade and all that will be left is the anger.

That's no fun for anyone.

If you have different political beliefs but can agree to disagree or can decide never to broach that terrain with each other, cool, but by and large politics play a huge part in our lives. If you two don't share these beliefs it could make being together forever one hell of a slog.

And let's face it, forever is pretty long even in the best of circumstances.

WeHeartIt

 

4. Sleeping Schedule  

This might seem like the silliest item on the list, but oh my god please do not underestimate the power of sleep in a relationship.

Let's say that you are a morning person. You don't feel right unless you get up with the sun.

That's awesome, good for you (MONSTER, I kid, I kid). But let's say that you are dating someone who NEEDS to sleep until at least 11am. 

That's going to be a serious hurdle for you both, and one that either requires one of you to be willing to sacrifice your sleep schedule or more ideally, one you've got to compromise on, leaving no one totally happy. 

I'm of the firm opinion that you need to be with someone whose sleep schedule matches your own.

If it doesn't, you'll be going through your relationship in a drowsy and unhappy fashion

 

Explore YourTango