You're human, after all.
I wish I was a true ice queen. I really do. It would make life easier on so many fronts. It'd make it easier for me to just sit there and smirk at people's misfortune, when in reality, I'm too much of a softie to not sympathize.
It takes a lot for me to actually get mean and cold-hearted with someone... and I really do mean a LOT. Unfortunately, society seems to think that still caring is a sign of weakness.
What has often bugged many people is how often I'll stick up for exes, even when they don't deserve it. There have been many, many times in my life when I've wondered if I was defective for still caring about some of my exes, even when they did pretty heinous sh*t to me. When people ask me why I still care about them, it's hard to explain.
If you're reading this, you may be in the same boat as me. You might wonder if you're wrong for caring, too. I just want you to know it's OK to still care about people who broke your heart. Here are 6 good reasons why:
1. You're human, after all.
We feel. That's what humans do. We have emotions. We are not robots that just shut off all emotion when heartbreak occurs. We may still care about them (sort of), but when we break up we know it's done for a reason. It's perfectly normal.
2. You'll always remember the memories you had together.
There's no magic pill that can wipe away months or years of good memories you may have had together. When you look into someone's eyes, you sometimes can't help but think about those days you spent. Unfortunately, good memories make us care about people who might not deserve that.
3. Just because you care about them doesn't mean you'd get back together with them.
I care about my most recent ex. I don't want to see him hurt. But I wouldn't get back together with him because we would not be a good couple. It's possible to care without being with him.
4. Sometimes, being a good person means you care about people.
Sure, he may have broken your heart, but do you really have to smirk when he's dealing with horrible sh*t? If serious tragedy struck the man, it's time to put aside the heartbreak. There are certain things you just don't do, and that includes kicking a dog when it's down.
5. You can care about someone from afar.
Caring doesn't always mean getting sucked into drama. Caring about someone doesn't mean martyring your well-being. It means that you just give a sh*t.
6. Being able to care is a sign of strength.
Only weak people sink to others' levels. It takes a person who is truly strong of character to show caring and empathy in the face of heartbreak. That being said, it takes an even stronger person to teach people not to mistake kindness for weakness.
7. There's a difference between still caring about an ex, and still being in love with them.
Here's what most people don't understand. Still caring means that you might get a twinge of sadness if you hear that they aren't doing too well. Still caring means that you might even offer them a hand if things are really bad, assuming that he isn't a mooch. Still caring may mean that you just give him a pep talk.
Still being in love with them means you'd go back to them. Still being in love with them means letting him use you, even though he hurt you that badly. Still being in love with them is NOT healthy.
The key to keeping things healthy in your life is to know this difference. If you're still in love with him, you need to stop that.