I Tried 5 Types Of Lingerie — Here's What Turned My Man On The MOST

Photo: Courtesy of the author
Self, Sex

"This bra is hiding the absolute magic that is your breasts."

I love all things girly. Lace and thigh highs, bras and bralettes. But I also don't go bonkers buying a bunch of stuff that will ultimately come off. I'm not a lingerie model, escort or dancer, so when I'm in lingerie it tends to come off right quick.

My boyfriend of four years is pretty specific about his tastes — and by specific, I means he likes my body, sans clothing. But he did buy me an Agent Provocateur gift card for Christmas, which he presented in front of his mother (true story, WTF?). Here's what I found out about his tastes in sexy lingerie

1. Stockings

He loves the idea of expensive-ass lingerie. "It's very Bond-girl," he says. I'm not surprised he likes such a classy brand. This is a man who owns 40 times — yes, 40 times — the amount of shoes I do. He's got a profound interest in accumulating expensive "bits" (he's British) on the cheap discount sites or in stores with mega sales. 

And yes, he's straight. So there's no surprise that his interest in the "typically" unattainable extends to my stockings and undies. These stockings were around 60 pounds. (73 dollars.) SIXTY. He says the snakes (which are the design on the back of the stockings) are "f*cking cool," and I agree. 

(Agent Provocateur, $60)

2. Pushup Bra

This cost me about 30 bucks. The color is sexy as hell and the cleavage looks brutally good. I love this femme fatale bra, and feel like a mega babe in it. But him? He says it's super-sexy looking but the push-up affect prevents him from feeling what my boobs really feel like.

"This bra is hiding the absolute magic that is your breasts," he says. That said, he's a hot-blooded male, so he was still totally cool with it. 

(H&M, €14.99)

3. Lacy Nightgown

He was super-into this, weirdly. I sort of feel like it's a bit of a lazy look, but it's soft, natural and lacy, and lets him feel me. The socks were all me being actually cold, by the way — but they were a winner, too, as high socks usually are, thanks to people fetishizing school-girl outfits (gross). This thing was probably 10 bucks.

"You look so pretty," he says. Aww. 

(Forever21, 7.99)

4. Black Bralette

​Well, well, well. This is my favorite look! I love how a bralette can make or break an outfit. Without the detailing, you're just wearing a basic bra. With it, you're wearing an experience.

In this picture, I'm out at a burlesque party looking fierce and gothic and sexy. And this is sort of a natural boob look, because bralettes leave nothing to the imagination. No lifting or shaping.

All he says is, "You should always wear this." Cost: 15 bucks. 15!

(Forever21, $10.90)

5. Lace Bodysuit

I bought this special little piece in Spain, and I've cherished it. It cost about 50 euros (54 dollars) and has been one of my favorites. It's stretchy, pretty, see-through and workable. I can wear it at home or out to special events.

As you can tell, I tend to go to weird events where I'm still over-dressed. But I do it for journalism, as you can see, so please don't judge me too harshly. His thoughts on this? He loves that it unclasps below, and that it's soft, natural and form-fitting.

(Intimissimi, $69)

The winner? The 15-dollar bralette.

He raves about it more than the others, but I think that's because he's a boob man and this is basically... all boob. You'd think the expensive stuff would be the winner, but nope. He's fine with a cheap-o item that looks pretty and feels good.

Also, he likes me. As he says, "You can gain 30 pounds and wear a garbage bag, and I'll love you." Whether he means this or not I don't worry about. It's the sentiment that matters. Also, I don't care if he likes it. I like it.



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