Love, Self

Smart Girls Don't Let Friendships Die Just Because They Found Love

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friends

I’ve spoken a hundred million thousand times on how easy it is to be consumed by a relationship — especially a new one. 

For at least the first month or two, your new partner is all you think about. Everything about them is wonderful, and you’re so happy you found this other person.

You're obsessed, and it's super cute. So obsessed that you kind of forget about your friends. Kind of. 

It happens, and when it happens to my friends, I try to be really understanding about it.

Because we all do it, even if we don’t want to admit it. 

And it's fine to hang with your boo more than you hang with your friends for the first month or so — as long as you come back. 

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If you stop making time for your friends than you’re in danger of becoming too dependent on your relationship.

I know everything is still shiny and new, and you don’t want to think about anything serious right now. But you don't lose yourself in something that might just be a temporary high. 

Friends are there to remind you about the things you love and the dreams you want to chase. They keep you in check. They're your support system and your team of advisors. 

Having good, solid friendships keeps you grounded.

They stop you from becoming so attached to a relationship that you put up with it even if it turns toxic. They make it easier to break up and let go of a guy who isn’t treating you right. 

Because if you do breakup — and I know you don't want to think about that right now — wouldn't you rather have a group of friends to turn to than no one? 

Friends add more depth and love to your life. They make sure your relationship isn’t your whole world. 

So when you get into a new relationship, make sure you still spend time with your friends.

Make sure there are girls nights — and no, girls nights where your boyfriend tags along do not count — and hour long phone calls and trip plans.

Make sure you’re not constantly on your phone checking in with bae when you’re with the squad. 

Make sure that he meets the squad. And make sure that he’s nice and respectful to them. 

Strong women don’t let their friendships falter just because they have a man in their lives.

And they definitely don’t let that man take them away from their friends.