Get in control, girl!
Feeling like taking control? There's a lot of ways to exert your dominance in the bedroom.
"The best dominance sex position has little to do with the physical location of your bodies; it has to do with the ability of the dominant partner to make downward eye contact (looking down on someone is quite literally a power position), and for the submissive partner to make upward eye contact. The key is eye contact, not necessarily the positions of your body," advises Michael Alvear of the sex advice site, callmemaybe.us.
Ready to go? Here are 10 awesome sex positions to get you started.
"I feel most dominant when wearing a strap-on. I can get my partner on their hands and knees. First pushing the strap-on in their mouth, f*cking their mouth. When I'm ready to go to their other hole, I f*ck them doggy style, as I can control the speed and depth. You are higher, both physically and mentally," says adult film actress Tanya Tate.
This is the classic female-dominant sex position and gives you a total dominant role.
"Simply have your partner lie on his back and then mount him like a pony. Add in a few traditional light BDSM touches for maximum effect, such as blindfolding him, or tying his wrists to the bedposts with his neckties," says Coleen Singer of Sssh.com.
Basically, any woman-astride position is a good one for dominance.
"Sitting on his face is sometimes called 'queening' — no relation to me!" says sexologist Carol Queen. "Any position is a domme one when you're telling him what to do and how to do it. But sitting atop him gives you the option of holding his arms down, making domina-fierce eye contact, and telling him exactly what to do to please you."
This is a brilliant position for both of you because it's mutually beneficial.
"Get your lover to lie down on his back then crawl on top of him and start sucking him off as you open your legs, and encourage him to start eating you out. Because you're on top, you get to be in control. Tell him loudly what you expect him to do and maybe cool down on your attention to his penis until he gets his own technique right on you.
Remember, teasing is always key to great sex, so try sitting on his face and demanding he satisfy you orally before you even think about returning the favor on him. And when you do start pleasuring him, only go so far as when he's about to cum, then stop and see how crazy it drives him. This is the time for true negotiation, so if there's anything you want him to do for you, this is the time to ask before you deliver the final climax," says Sienna Sinclaire, best selling author of Naughty Girl's Guide to Los Angeles.
Pegging is a very powerful sex act which puts you, as a woman, in complete control.
"It might take a bit of coaxing to get your fellow to consent to this, but you'll be surprised how many guys fantasize about this. Plus, it stimulates his prostate, leading him to amazing orgasms. Many women find pegging to be very physically taxing on the lower back and thighs, so take it easy on this at first to find the position most comfortable for you," says Singer.
"For domination, I recommend to patients that they discover their partner's weak spots. Does your partner always want to have sex with the lights on? Get a blindfold and cover those eyes. Does your partner always take charge and lead the way? An investment in a pair of handcuffs can go a long way," says Dr. Sharon Stills, naturopathic medical doctor.
6. The Amazon
This is a great position for the hetero man who doesn't mind being dominated by his partner, and for the woman who is into taking full control of him.
"The male partner lays on his back with his legs in the air and bends them at the knees. The female partner then straddles him, sitting on top of his pelvis and using her hands to help keep his legs in the air. Adding a blindfold to the equation could heighten the experience for him," says sex expert Tyomi Morgan.
7. The Lapdance
All photos: weheartit
What guy doesn't like a lapdance? Even if your lover's never been to a club, this is your chance to fulfill one of his fantasies, and you get to control everything.
"Tease him with a lapdance, then crawl on top of his lap and ride him as he sits. Use your body to twist and turn, like real lapdancers do, pushing your boobs into his face or grinding him with your hips and ass. Turn around and ride him from the back, too, so he gets to see you from all angles. Use dirty talk to whisper in his ear all the things you're going to do to him," says Sinclaire.