15 Signs He's A Commitment-Phobe Posing As A Hopeless Romantic

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15 Signs Hes Commitment-Phobe Posing As A Hopeless Romantic

"Oh, I'm a hopeless romantic..." – Approximately 1 out of 10 fuckboys.

Being a hopeless romantic was the kind of thing that us girls were told to pursue in a man. We were told that hopeless romantics would shower us with romantic gifts, watch The Notebook with us, and even rub our shoulders after a long day of work.

And... people were right. They would do romantic things to get us. Hopeless romantics do, in fact, do adorable things to get us to melt our icy hearts for them. The problem is that they also have a dark side to them, and that dark side is commitment-phobia.

What happens with "hopeless romantics" is that they are addicted to the chase and can't commit to anyone out of fear of "running out of romance." Though some hopeless romantic can commit, many just can't. Here are some signs that your hopeless romantic is a hopeless pursuit.

1. He doesn't ever really seem to have long-term relationships.


You know this type! You've known him to woo, wine, and dine girls, but he never quite seems eager to settle down. The end result is a string of failed relationships and a lot of broken hearts.

2. You noticed that the gifts and compliments stopped after you two were officially an item.

Now that you two are together, it almost seems like he's bored, you know?

3. At first, all he'd talk about is marriage; now, he skirts the issue.

This is a key sign of a commitment-phobe who's posing as a hopeless romantic. This shows that he likes the idea of marriage but will always get too bored to actually pop the question.

4. It's always his ex's fault that the two split up.

When you hear his stories, you'd think his exes were she-devils in human suits! Every single time you hear of an ex, you hear the nasty things she did to him, even when it doesn't seem that horrible. If every ex seems like an abusive, unstable wreck, you have to wonder why a romantic like him would date you.

5. He has an unnervingly large collection of Disney films or chick flicks.


Don't fall for this trap! A guy who buys too much into Hollywood romances is a guy who can't handle a realistic relationship.

6. You feel like you need to play a part or entertain him.

If you constantly get the feeling that you need to keep him entertained or he'll leave, it's probably because it's true. Unfortunately, this happens to be what "hopeless romantics" tend to be about. Once they feel they've conquered you, they bolt.

7. It seems like he has a thing for damsels in distress.

If the guy you like keeps insisting on "rescuing" girls, you need to move on. He'll probably end up leaving you once you're in a good position in life.

8. Everyone thinks his standards are unreal.

He's the chubby, physically unattractive, unemployed guy who keeps hitting on modelesque women in high powered positions. He's the "romantic" who always tried to court women 15 to 20 years younger than him. While this may work in rom-coms, the reality of the situation is that these kinds of hopeless romantics typically only court women who are out of their leagues because they can't look past a woman's superficial traits.

9. The romance he's into always seems superficial.

If it seems superficial, it's because it is. Guys who are like this don't like women to get too close to them, because it may make them drop their dashing, romance hero façade.

10. He moves waaaay too fast.


Within the first week, he's already asked you to move in with him. He's constantly talking about meeting relatives and going on vacation together. Any time a guy does this, you need to be wary. This is either a sign of a serial monogamist or an abuser, and neither will lead to a happy, long-term commitment.

11. He runs hot and cold.

This is a classic sign of a commitment-phobe who feels a need to sabotage his relationships. If you find yourself always doing wrong, no matter what you try to do, he's trying to make a way out for himself.

12. He's unusually charming.

Does he always seem to know what to say? If so, be careful. Most players tend to have silver tongues.

13. You notice that he has dating damage control down to a T.

Ever notice how the most sociopathic people tend to already know how they're going to do damage control when they do something terrible? You can't help but notice that they already have a lot of damage control for breakups to a T.

14. If you really think about it, he's self-centered.

His actions always are a means to an end. Nothing about him is ever selfless. The reason why is because his love of romance is all about him playing a role, not him actually looking for a commitment.

15. There's always a reason why he hasn't lived with anyone or had a long-term commitment.


And half of those reasons don't make sense. Why? Because he's a commitment-phobic man.



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