Oral sex shouldn't be rocket science, guys.
We get it, guys — the vagina is a mysterious place. We know you want to please us, tease us, and give us earth-shattering orgasms. The thing is that a lot of the time, you tend to make small mistakes that can make oral sex a less-than-stellar time for us.
At times, we wish that we could sit you down and talk to you about the general roadmap of our girlie parts.
The fact is that pleasing a woman orally isn't rocket science. At the same time, though, females really wish you would be more aware of the following things:
1. If you're not into it, don't be surprised if we don't give you blowjobs or decide to break up with you.
Refusing to eat p*ssy is a huge dealbreaker for a lot of women who enjoy it. Just like you wouldn't date a girl who refused to suck your dick, a lot of women won't date a guy who won't go down on them.
2. You can seriously traumatize us by complaining about our taste or smell down there.
Seriously guys, don't do this. It's the equivalent of a girl making fun of your dick, and it's insanely messed up to do to someone you're dating. Unless you don't want to have the girl you're with sleep with you or even be in a decent mood, you will say nothing about her personal flavor or scent. If things really don't smell right down there, just don't give her oral sex.
3. That being said, a lot of women are really uncomfortable with oral sex.
Girls often worry that they smell strange, taste odd, or just look weird down there. Because of all the insecurities that are shoved down our throats by mainstream media and other people, it can take a bit of coaxing for some of us to open up to oral.
4. It shows major trust that we let you go down on us.
It's not something that we let everyone do, For many girls, it's a sign that they really trust and that you will not be a jerk about it.
5. There's also a chance that we just might not like oral.
It's rare, but speaking as someone who doesn't enjoy oral sex, I can assure you that we do exist. Don't take it as an affront if we don't want you there.
6. We really don't like that "alphabet" trick.
Yes, you know the one. Yeah, stop that. I have yet to hear a single girl who wants a guy to do that to her.
7. While you're at it, don't just tongue-f*ck her, either.
There's more to a vagina than just the opening. Play with the clit. Run your tongue along her labia. Do something other than sticking your tongue in and out of the hole like a deranged hummingbird!
8. Actually, we'll let you know when you're doing things right.
There's a reason why girls tend to get very vocal during oral. We're usually open to guiding you towards what we want to have done to us.
9. Don't even think about putting your tongue back there without giving us a heads up.
Not all women like that, and that will make some jump out of bed.
10. If you're going to act like a martyr just because you had to give oral sex to a woman, don't bother going downstairs.
Seriously, this is so unattractive. If you want the sex session to go to a screeching halt and make a girl resent you, this is a good way to do it.
11. Stop telling us how much you love eating p*ssy as a pickup line.
Dude, this is so insanely skeevy and scavy! Unless you're totally cool with having a girl flip out at you, block you, call security on you, or look at you with a visage filled with disgust, you have to stop talking about your oral skills as a way to flirt.
12. Really, a little enthusiasm goes a long way.
Guys, really, if you want to stand out from your fellow men, it's easy. Actually enjoy giving a girl oral and you'll probably be memorable in our books.