It doesn't have to go down that way.
Ending a relationship can be one of the most toughest and most revealing things we go through. They force us to be honest about what we've been doing wrong in the hopes that we'll be more clear when it comes to what we want in our future romances.
They leave us raw, vulnerable and well, kind of crazy.
It's not bad or anything to be ashamed of. You've had your heartbroken and you're allowed to eat as much ice cream as you want or fall into whatever cliché you feel like falling into.
Sometimes we can do that uninterrupted and surrounded by a protective shield of friends and seclusion. Other times, we meet somebody new. Rebounding is when things can get dangerous.
As everything in life, it's all about your current mindset. If your ex was a total ass and you've been ready to move on for months, than a casual fling might be just what you need. But if you were blindsided by your breakup or you're not sure what you really want than a rebound might not be a great idea.
Sadly there's no scientific way to know when you're ready to meet somebody knew. You have to trust your gut — whatever the hell that means — and know where you stand.
While rebounds tend to have a bad rap, there's always potential for something real to happen.
Love has a tendency to come when you least expect it, and that time might be when you've completely given up.
So if you find yourself about to (or in the middle) of a rebound and you're starting to freak out about what the eff you're doing, try these tips to keep your sanity — and maybe the guy too:
1. Go for the the polar opposite of your ex
The last thing on Earth you want is another replica of what you just had. Not only will you be constantly comparing them to your ex, but it also keeps you in this small little bubble of experience and prevents you from seeing what else is out there.
So if you were previously in love with a nerdy, video-game loving guy, than date a farmer. Don't worry so much about the end result, just try hanging out with someone you wouldn't normally hang out with and see what happens.
2. Stop making lists
After a breakup, we've got a pretty clear picture of what we want and don't want out of a relationship. Love is at the forefront of our minds, and not in a good way. So while at that point in your life you had to get serious, this is the time you need to relax.
3. Throw caution to wind and be open to love
So stop making rules about what you will or won't accept in a man. Stop creating these stupidly high standards that no one you meet when you go out tonight will ever live up to. Your emotions have been completely drained and it's time to refill the tank. The only way you do that is by having fun.
And while there are no guarantees, when you let your guard down and just be, that's when the real magic happens.