You look sweet and innocent, but...
People think the world is divided into good girls and bad girls. That's not strictly true. They're forgetting about the best of all: the good girl who knows how to be bad.
You look sweet and innocent, act sweet and innocent, but nurture a core of inner rebel. You're the one mama never worries about, but who your friends know can get down and party. The good girl who knows how to be bad is the most fun of all. Here's how to see if you are one.
1. You have a piercing.
No single-hole pearl earrings for you. When you were 18, you went to the tattoo parlor, alone, got your navel pierced ... and hid it under the skirt of your Catholic school uniform. You may have something funky done to your cartilage: some extra holes, even an industrial or tragus piercing. If you're really skirting the line, you might have a tasteful nose piercing. But only something small, metal, and unobtrusive.
2. You dye your hair red or black.
No bright-colored ombre for you; it's too ... something. But you love red, the symbol of the perpetual troublemaker. Or you go black, with all its gothy implications. But you get the color done at the salon, with highlights, so it looks as natural as possible and everyone compliments you on it.
3. You love stiletto heels.
There's something perpetually sexy about the stiletto, all that weight balanced on such a slender tower. Its sexiness goes beyond foot fetishes and into the rest of the world. You love wearing your stillettos, especially the red ones, and may have a collection of them. You certainly wear them to work, with your demure little outfits, and anywhere else you need to dress up.
The showerhead's not good enough for you. You bought your first vibrator long ago and moved into dildos shortly after. You got those for yourself, not for any boy to watch you use them. When you do have a boy, you've got the handcuffs on the bedside table, along with the flavored lube.
5. You're a student of the good blowjob.
Every girl goes down. The good girl who knows how to the bad has spent time honing her technique. You've read all those articles about how to suck good d*ck, and you put that advice into practice. You experiment. You try new things. Most of all, you do it on your knees, because that's the way guys like it best. Bonus points if you do it while wearing your glasses.
6. You don't drive the speed limit.
It's a low-level rebellion, but a rebellion nonetheless. You're always going ten over, no more than fifteen, though you may push that on a 70 MPH interstate. Nothing your friends would write home about (except on the interstate), but your own personal rebellion regardless. You have places to be, and that's more important than some stupid posted sign.
7. You grew up Catholic.
You know that Billy Joel song, right? The one about Catholic girls starting much too late? No one knows good like a Catholic girl, and no one knows bad like a Catholic girl gone wrong. Who else got taught the meaning of lust in second grade? You're outwardly super-sweet, but you know every sin in the Cathechism, and you're not afraid to use them.
8. You've had a one-night stand.
You don't usually have sex on the first date, but you've done it before — and you didn't call him afterwards. You don't make a practice of it, or you'd just be a bad girl. But once in a while, when you're not with anyone (or maybe when you are), you like to indulge in some wham, bam, thank you, ma'am.
9. You wear a lot of black.
You couch it in office attire, of course. It's OK to wear black if it's a jacket and pants. Everyone has a black winter coat, plus a black scarf. Then there are your black yoga pants — you had to buy black tops to match. And every girl has a little black dress. You just have a lot of them. Black is sort of your color, but in a stealth way that people don't notice. You didn't even notice until you really thought about it.
10. You've played your share of practical jokes.
Not the switch-the-sugar-and-the-salt kind. The fun kind, where you egg someone's house, or toilet paper their car, or fill their entire office with helium balloons. You're not above a well-placed post-it on someone's back, either.
You're a good girl. You might go to church. You still have your childhood stuffed animal, and you listen to pop music. But deep down, you know how to be bad. It's just a matter of bringing it out — and when you do, people love you for it.