Photo: weheartit
Warning: These are NOT for your actual dad... ;)
By Rebecca Jane Stokes — Written on Jun 17, 2016
Father's day is a very special time of year. It's when we pause to recognize the men in our lives who have helped make us who we are.
Usually we do this buy him a golf themed greeting card and/or a tie that is hopefully not that ugly.
It doesn't really matter what you get the guy, it's the thought that counts. Dads are a study in patience.
But what do you get for that other daddy in your life? You know, the sexy one.
This daddy could be your baby daddy, but he's all yours in the sheets (I made myself gag a little with that one).
Our sexy-times daddies are the best, and they don't get an official holiday. So show the dom in your life just what's up with one of these intensely sexy gifts. Truly.
(They are so sexy that when I was done writing them I had to swoon dramatically onto a sofa.)
1. A "Daddy's" Tattoo On Your Butt
Fun fact, butt tattoos aren't that painful because of the amount of, uh, shall we say, padding? It is here I should note that I do not have a butt tattoo (hi, mom).
Pretend that you've forgotten this auspicious holiday until it comes time for lights out. Then present him with your inflamed ham and its accompanying branding.
2. Bondage Tape
No need to wrap this gift up. The wrapping IS the gift. Present it and yourself to him during a private moment.
Nothing brings you and bedfellow closer than some light bondage.
3. World's Best Dad Cock Ring
I am 99% sure that this is a thing you will have to special order.
(Hold on. *Googles*. Lol, my eyes.)
Okay yeah. You'll never have to special order this one, but I guarantee it he'll be way happier with this than another tie or a mug he won't use.
4. Daddy's Night Out
Call the babysitter, because you are taking daddy out for a night on the town. Perhaps a burlesque show, a fondue dinner with low lighting, maybe a quickie in a back alley.
Channel your inner freak this Father's day.
5. A Threesome
"Oh daddy, there's someone strange in our bed! I think she needs some punishment."
If his head doesn't explode first, this will be the father's day gift of a lifetime.
6. Breakfast In Bed
Cover yourself in eggs and beseech him to chow down. Your body is like Denny's. Give him a moon over my-hammy he won't soon forget.
A grand-slam would also be a good joke about Denny's.