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Sometimes love is worth fighting for.
By Emily Blackwood — Written on Jun 02, 2016
At the beginning of a relationship, everything is pretty much perfect.
You're so wrapped up in this new, shiny person you're with that fighting with them seems next to impossible. But eventually, after two people have been together for a long time and become more and more entangled in each other's lives, it happens. And it's okay. The little things that you ignored or assumed would go away are starting to annoy you. And that's fine. Those shiny new relationship goggles are coming off and you starting to see him as a person instead of this great, incredible cute guy that caught your attention.
In fact, it's what's your supposed to be doing.
Fighting is a type of communication, and though sometimes it can get really messy, it's a way you become closer to your significant other. You learn to tolerate and love each other in all your moods. It's kind of the key to a lasting relationship. People fight because they care because they want to fix whatever is happening.
So if you've been together for a while and you're STILL not fighting, something is wrong.
While I don't know the magic number as to when you should start arguing, I think you can tell something is off if you feel no passion.
Couples fight because they love each other, they want nothing more than to be together and for the other person to enjoy the same thing. They fight when they feel the relationship — especially how the other person feels — has changed and is in jeopardy.
So while it might seem logically crazy to fight because you're jealous of your boyfriend's blonde co-worker constantly texting them, when you're in a passionate relationship that you want to be in, it doesn't seem crazy at all. As long as you can do it correctly. You can't just go around accusing him of cheating simply because a new has started to work with him or one sits next to him randomly on the bus.
So if you really don't give a sh*t about who your boyfriend is texting, it's probably because you don't want him to know who you're texting.
Relationships are full of fights because that's how people get closer. If you're not fighting, you don't want to grow closer. And that's fine, but you should probably reevaluate whether or not you should even be with this person. A relationship without fights seems ideal, but if something is bothering you and you don't communicate it, then nothing is going to change.
Because everyone deserves someone who's willing to fight for them.
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Emily Blackwood is a freelance health, wellness, and self-care writer. Her work has appeared in Her Agenda, Huffington Post, and Foundr.