Do NOT rebound!!!
By Kelly Bojos
Breakups suck, but you can overcome them! We know it's extremely hard and life as you know it no longer makes sense without this person, but you are more than capable of finding your happiness.
Here are 10 important tips to help you survive a bad breakup.
1. Cry it out.
Don't bottle in your emotions, let them out. Scream, yell and do a JT, cry yourself a river!
It's okay to have a total meltdown, but make sure that meltdown doesn't drag on for weeks. Let's be honest here, it's going to feel like someone ripped out your heart and threw it in a blender. Take a few days to stay at home to cry, eat junk food and take bubble baths. Gather your thoughts, but don't let them drown you.
You're not going to want anything to do with the outside world, but it helps to have someone with you who is always there for you. So if it's a parent or friend, let someone be there to remind you that you're in fact going to be okay because you will be, we promise!
2. Unplug to reconnect.
This next step is for your own good! Spying on what your ex is posting is only going to drive you insane, so why torture yourself (unless you're a masochist). Unfollow, unfriend and block your ex from all your social media sites.
This is not only going to help ease your mind and heart, but why should they be able to see what 'newly single' you is up to! Another thing to consider is if you also follow their friends, you don't need to have pictures or snaps of them popping up, making your heart stop.
Even better, try a social media cleanse. Take the time to unplug so that you can reconnect with the most important person in your life, you! Set a time goal for yourself, sign out, delete the apps off your phone and just focus on making your heart, mind and soul healthier. We promise you will in fact feel more connected than ever not only to yourself, but to the most important people in your life.
3. Pamper yourself.
Heartbreak literally hurts your heart, but it's something you can conquer! You need to get out of your 2-day-old PJs, shower and go out to pamper yourself. Get a massage, mani/pedi, get those 'brows on fleek again and even get a sexy blowout. Try to stay away from dyeing or cutting your hair when you're in such a vulnerable stage, you'll regret it.
4. Your daily mantra.
Breakups have a way of making you feel like there's something wrong with you. Questions like "why not me?" play in your head over and over again. If you did your all to be a good partner then there was nothing else you could've done any better. You need to create a mantra for yourself, say it every day and most importantly you need to believe it!
Tell yourself you're beautiful, you deserve someone who is going to value you, you gave it your all and you're going to get through this. This person may have broken your heart, but they haven't broken who you are as a person. The only person who is going to pick up the pieces and make them fit perfectly back together is you!
5. Focus on your goals.
Being in a relationship can have a tendency of shaking your focus on certain goals you have. This is understandable and happens to everyone, it doesn't mean you were being lazy. It just means you were putting in the time and effort to make the relationship thrive and therefore weren't giving your goals the 100% attention they should've been getting.
Take this time to keep busy, keep focused and get things done. Try writing down your goals in a journal and what you're going to do to accomplish them. Get reacquainted with your ambitions.
6. Get it right, get it tight.
Get sweaty! Not only will you relieve stress, but your confidence will skyrocket. What's better then looking good for yourself!? Nothing. You can't let your self-confidence go because you're sad, in fact, you have to do the opposite. You need to look and feel better than you ever have before.
The best revenge is success, happiness and looking amazing!
7. Post a hot selfie.
This is the most narcissistic step, but it's 2015! Post a hot selfie of yourself on the 'gram and feel good doing it. Take an extreme halt to posting any sad sub-tweets or sad memes, but do post happy pictures of yourself. If you've done all of the steps so far, then it's time for a beautiful selfie!
8. Go out and have fun.
You need to go out even if you don't want to go out! And that's an order!
Surround yourself with people that make you happy and that you have fun with. Go out and meet new people. You'd be surprised, the times when you really don't want to go out, you end up having the most memorable nights.
Go out for drinks, eat delicious food and dance the night away to music that will take your mind to a better place.
9. Don't rebound.
Don't do it! People think rebounding is going to help cure their broken hearts, but it's not at all. Rebounds are temporary and if you do something you regret there's no going back.
Now that's not saying, if someone nice comes along that wants to take you out you say no. You should totally go out and enjoy a possible new friend and a free dinner. (Haha!)
10. Do things you love.
If you have a hobby you love, you need to take the time to do it. You will feel more like yourself than ever because you're doing something you hold dear to your heart. If it's reading, traveling, taking a dance class, painting, or visiting museums; take the time to do the things that may have taken the back burner.
Also, try doing new things you've never done before. It may scare you, but you'll get a confidence kick that will remind you how badass you are!
It might sound cliche, but time does in fact heal all. You will get through this and you will get everything you deserve. Take it day by day, and be selfish. Put yourself first, life is too short to wake up with regrets. No one said it would be easy, but life throws you situations you are strong enough to handle! Always remember that.
This article was originally published at Guest of a Guest. Reprinted with permission from the author.