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We all have our dramatic moments, but let's keep them to a minimum.
By BlogHer — Last updated on Jul 17, 2023
By Julia Bailey Fenton
Let’s face it: nobody appreciates a drama queen, but most of us aren’t willing to admit when we’re being one. Whether it's in our friendships, romantic relationships, or workplace, that selfish and ugly attitude is a complete turn-off and pushes away friends, loved ones, and colleagues.
Sometimes, we may not even realize we're being drama queens. And it can have serious effects.
What does it mean to be a drama queen?
The term "drama queen" describes someone who tends to exaggerate or overreact to mundane situations in a melodramatic manner. Drama queens display excessive emotions, react intensely to the tiniest of issues, and seek attention or sympathy from others.
Drama queens turn mountains into mole hills, so to speak, blowing situations out of proportion to make themselves the center of attention. They need constant validation and assurance, and enjoy bringing others into their own emotional turmoil.
This behavior is incredibly exhausting for the people around the drama queen, and may lead to distance between the drama queen and their loved ones.
Before you get confrontational and swear that this doesn’t apply to you, check out some of these signs that you are, in fact, a huge drama queen.
15 Signs You’re A Drama Queen
1. You find a way to make everything about yourself, even when it’s not.
When someone else is telling you a story, somehow the topic always turns back to your issues. Whether it's good news, bad news, or just a random thought, you redirect the attention back to your own experiences and feelings. It makes others feel dismissed or ignored.
2. You’re a terrible listener.
When others are speaking, you tend to zone out or wait for your turn to talk. Your lack of attentiveness and disinterest in others' stories and problems is probably the reason your friends don’t often ask you for advice.
3. You crave gossip.
Whether it’s celebrity nonsense or real acquaintances, you love to talk about people behind their backs (which means you're also terrible at keeping secrets). You thrive on the latest rumors and will spread them to anyone who will listen.
This habit is particularly damaging to the trust in your relationships, as people see you as someone who can't keep secrets or respect their privacy.
4. You get angry or upset very easily.
You may try to blame it on hormones, but people walk on eggshells around you all the time. Minor inconveniences quickly escalate into emotional outbursts. This volatility makes it difficult for others to communicate with you.
5. You find a way to turn every tiny issue into a huge ordeal.
You blow the smallest issues out of proportion, where a minor misunderstanding quickly turns into a full-blown crisis. It’s exhausting, it’s obnoxious, and it’s unnecessary.
6. You’re judgmental.
Whether it’s someone’s fashion choice, or their choice in romantic partners, you usually have a negative opinion about it and are quick to express disapproval. Your judgmental behavior distances you from potential connections.
7. You don’t take criticism well.
Even when it’s constructive, you're always defensive and have a snarky comeback ready to go. Instead of using criticism as an opportunity to grow, you become defensive and respond with snarky remarks or justifications.
8. You’re always right.
Not really, but in your mind you are. Your friends and loved ones don’t even bother arguing with you anymore, because it’s a lost cause. Instead, they resort to just walking away or taking some time to cool off and let it go.
9. You’re spoiled.
Whether it’s your parents fault or your partner's, you're used to getting your way, and your expectations are unrealistically through the roof. This sense of entitlement can lead to disappointment when things don't go as planned and can strain your relationships.
10. You complain... a lot.
Nothing ever goes right for you. You constantly find something to complain about, whether it's the weather, traffic, or minor inconveniences. Your constant complaining drains the energy of those around you and brings everyone down.
11. You're emotionally reactive.
You tend to react emotionally, impulsively and intensely to situations, often without considering the consequences. Your emotional reactivity creates unnecessary drama and makes it challenging to have open and calm conversations.
12. You manipulate and control others.
You tend to use emotional manipulation and control to get your way. Whether it's guilt-tripping or playing mind games, you leave those around you feeling manipulated and drained.
13. You make everything difficult for the people around you.
From planning outings to making decisions, you create unnecessary complications. Your need for drama and attention makes it challenging for others to navigate everyday situations smoothly.
14. You're incredibly picky.
While there's nothing wrong with having high standards, you have specific preferences for everything, from food to relationships. Your pickiness leads to constant dissatisfaction and creates tension in your interactions.
15. You tend to play the victim.
Even when you're at fault, you portray yourself as the one who has been wronged. You seek sympathy and attention, hindering personal growth and burning bridges in the process.
Being a drama may just be a temporary phase you're going through, or there could be real underlying issues you’ve been ignoring. Either way, it’s time to take off that tiara and do some soul-searching, before you find yourself searching for new friends.
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Julia Bailey Fenton is a writer, content creator, consultant, and former contributor to BlogHer.