Is there marriage in the future of your relationship or a messy breakup?
Have you ever been in a relationship and wished you had some kind of psychic power to predict where it was headed? Well, science has come up with a way to predict the fate of your relationship, without the use of tarot cards or crystal balls.
The research, conducted by Brian Ogolsky of the University of Illinois and his colleagues, classified couples by the changes in their commitment to get married and the reasons supporting these changes. The study (unlike previous individual-centered ones) focused on relationships as a unit, and also looked at the relationship in conjunction with social media.
The subjects of the study were 376 unmarried couples in their mid-20s who were studied over a nine-month period. The participants were asked to note whenever they felt a major shift in how they felt about their partner, and were interviewed on a monthly basis.
Some of the things that could affect the relationship negatively included spending too much time with friends, fighting, or not having enough in common. On the opposite end of the spectrum, meeting the significant other's family, spending a lot of time together and having many things in common helped strengthen the commitment to wed.
The researchers used all the information to predict whether the relationship would last, which was defined as ending in marriage. So, does your relationship fall into any of these commitment types?
1. Dramatic: This kind of couple has an up-and-down type of relationship with more downs than ups. They enjoy more time apart from their significant other and have more negative opinions of their relationship. In addition, the couples' families and friends are a lot less supportive of the relationship.
Diagnosis: People in the Dramatic group are more than twice as like to breakup than any of the other three groups.
2. Partner-focused: In this type of relationship, the commitment approach is one of "my partner is the center of my universe" and in turn, there are very few downturns. Their changes in commitment revolve around how much time they are able to spend together.
Diagnosis: Those in the partner-focused group are more likely to have their relationships progress steadily and in a positive way, going naturally from casual dating to promising a more serious commitment.
3. Socially involved: This kind of couple experiences very little change, and when they do it usually isn't in a negative way. When changes do happen, it's mostly determined by the amount of interaction they have regarding social media, and what their family and friends think of the relationship.
Diagnosis: This type of relationship relies too much on what other people think and therefore has a shaky foundation. It might last for a while but the chances are that they'll breakup are good.
4. Conflict-ridden: These couples are generally ones who fight the most and have a high number of downturns. Interestingly, the size of the changes of the relationship aren't as steep as the dramatic types, and are mostly due to conflicts. They have less good to say about their relationship than the partner-focused couples, and less support from the socially involved group. Yet, the conflict-ridden group is more likely to keep their relationship status stable than the dramatic group. Maybe the fighting keeps the relationship viable and passionate?
Diagnosis: While the Conflict-ridden group is more likely to keep their status stable when compared to the conflict-ridden group, they aren't on solid ground. Try not to support rather than fight with your partner.
Classification is simplification and can only indicate certain relationship trends. Most relationships can't neatly fit into one of these types, and are combinations of one or two of them.
Summation: If your relationship is partner-focused it has the greatest chance of going the distance, making a long-term commitment of marriage and beyond. Socially involved and conflict-ridden are tied for longevity, and dramatic is least lasting of the commitment types.