Thank you, on behalf of women everywhere.
Talking about orgasms can be a difficult topic for both men and women to discuss with one another. But it's an important talk to have. One brave, anonymous blogger took it upon herself to create a space where women and men can begin to decode the mysteries behind orgasms.
How to Make Me Come produces essays surrounding real life stories about the writer's experience with orgasms. The anonymous creator of the blog talked to The Cut about her reasons for creating the blog, and the importance of discussing such a sensitive subject.
When coming up with the premise of the blog, the creator thought about the effects that speaking up about orgasms can have on women. She states, "If you can't voice what you want in a moment when you are excited, desired, and connecting with someone, then it's no wonder that you can't always voice what you want out in the world."
As the project grew, she started to think about the ways in which we can feel confident and unafraid to take control in our daily lives. But behind closed doors, "in those private sexual moments that you can feel most afraid and stuck." Even worse, we can feel like a hypocrite.
Although this blog is immensely popular with women, men can appreciate it as well. For the creator, "This is a platform for women to express themselves (and hopefully have a clarifying, therapeutic experience in the process)." The raw personal essays can peak the curiosity of men, too.
One major lesson we can take away from How to Make Me Come is the fact that everyone experiences orgasms differently. Because of this, the personal essays may not share the same ideas on the ways in which we come. Each orgasmic experience is unique to the individual having one.
But the creator believes that "They all help us to see how particular both the sexual frustrations and fantasies are for each individual." Furthermore, this blog allows everyone to "approach the mystery of your partner's experience ... have a deep awareness and sense of empathy for the spectrum of possibilities, and then have an open communication about what you are both going through."
For couples, this blog opens the door to much needed conversations about orgasms, so they can understand what makes them come together.