Swoon!
By Melanie Gorman and Karen Finn and Pat Love and Julie Nise and Jasbina Ahluwalia — Written on Aug 22, 2018
Every relationship needs romance to thrive, but you don't need to be hopeless romantic in order to instill this into their relationships.
Many people, especially men, believe that they aren't the "romantic type" because they don't feel like comfortable making huge romantic gestures and pronouncing their love to the world. But romance is WAY more than that.
Need some romance tips? SVP of YourTango Experts Melanie Gorman, divorce coach Dr. Karen Finn, relationship trainer Julie Nise, matchmaker and relationship coach Jasbina Ahluwalia and counselor/therapist Dr. Pat Love discuss important ways to maintain the romantic bond between you and your partner.
Here are three steps they say will keep the romance alive:
1. Establish Emotional Security
When you are emotionally secure with your partner, you feel comfortable sharing everything, with being emotionally naked. That romantic bond then feels effortless, and you'll naturally strive to make your partner happy.
2. Talk About What Makes You Happy
Although you have this bond, your partner can't read your mind. Discuss what makes each of you happy so you know exactly what your partner wants — both in and out of the bedroom.
"[Romance] really goes back to an individual dynamic between you and your partner, so I think having that conversation with your partner — What really turns you on? What makes you tick? What's important? — [goes] back to the five love languages with Gary Chapman," explains Jasbina Ahluwalia, "or just some real conversation about what's important for me. I know for me, what really turns me on may not be the same as what turns my partner on ...".
3. Show Your Love
Now, that you know what actually makes your partner happy, show your love and do the things that bring your partner happiness.
According to Dr. Karen Finn, "You have to act [your love] out because if all you're doing is, I want this. I want this. This is romantic to me, you're not going to get anywhere, right? So sometimes you have to demonstrate and be free enough and confident enough and safe enough to do that."
You can do anything from cooking a delicious dinner at home to sending your partner a huge bouquet of roses — any sweet gesture that undoubtedly proves your deep love for your partner.
Want MORE romance? Scroll up to the video above to hear some more great expert advice!