Is It Wrong To Have My Best Friends Write My Texts FOR Me?

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Love, Self

"It takes a village" used to apply to child-reading; now it applies to texting.

My girlfriends compose my my text messages.

I know that's not completely honest but I do it anyway.

It's not that the feelings I'm sending via text aren't mine; it's just that the glasses I wear are somewhat opaque when it comes to a love interest. In between knee-jerk reactions, misconstrued texts, my friends are the voice of reason.

It's not just me, though. I cannot tell you how many conversations I overhear between women who are asking one another for text advice.

Dating has somehow became a highly competitive sport and provided us with revolving doors named MatchTinder, Hinge, etc.

We flip through prospective mates the way we shop for food. Oh, this peach looks good ... oops, there's a little bruise. Let me get another one. On top of our blasé attitude toward replacing an almost-perfect peach, men barely work for their food and women no longer require them to.

The only upperhand women now have is text unavailability, clever verbiage, and selfies. "Playing the game" is an expectation.

Men aren't stupid; they know we're playing it but it's the only way to keep them slightly off-kilter and appeal to their hunter gene.

From teenagers to sixty-somethings, we're all doing it. We take photos of the incoming texts, send them to our girlfriend, mothers, sisters, who spend hours analyzing the content and penning a response. Its disheartening and exhausting.

I don't know who wrote the texting "rules," but they're in full force. Don't answer right away; you don't want to seem like you're waiting a round for a certain text. Answer too late and the conversation may be tabled for hours.

Personally, I think it's rude not to answer in good time. I wouldn't do that to my family or friends, yet I've done it in boy/girl situations.

It seems to be the only way to seem "hard to get," as we no longer receive phone calls and run the "let me check my calendar" line while our suitor waits on hold.

As I write this, my friend's daughter has been advising her girlfriend on text content, and she herself is waiting out for a guy who hasn't texted for three days. Sigh.

Today's mantra: "Make peace with the game and be grateful for your girlfriends."



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