11 Reasons "Quitting" Facebook Is A Desperate Plea For Attention

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quit facebook
Self, Family

Your thirst is so real.

Leaving Facebook is a thing. People do it all the time, whether temporarily or for good (though the latter is really rare). But there are a ton of people who announce their plans to quit their Facebook addiction ... on Facebook.

These people who look down on fellow Facebook users for supposedly wasting time or needing validation of some kind are just as bad as those they're denouncing with their grand proclamations of exits.

Is there anything more hypocritical and narcissistic than leaving a platform just for the sake of seeing who begs you to stay? (A helpful hint: No one will. One or two pals may pretend, but those closest to you can just text you, and no one else involved actually cares at all.)

Seriously, just go. You're clogging up our newsfeeds with your bullsh*t. It's almost as annoying as when you clog it with your ugly kids. Maybe you're just upset that everyone is tired of pretending that they're not tiny cave trolls.

We know. You want to be a special snowflake.
Photo: Tumblr
Lea Michele as Rachel Berry on "Glee" saying "All I ever wanted was to feel special"
You're like, so above it.
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Meryl Streep saying "whatever" onstage at an awards show
You really want us to think you have better sh*t to do.
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Chris Pratt, Aubrey Plaza and Nick Offerman as Andy, April Ludgate and Ron Swanson on "Parks and Recreation" ("Parks and Rec")
But actually, you don't.
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Sounds like you might just have some serious FOMO issues.
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britney spears confused
Or, you're a little miffed that no one really likes your photos.
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Prince Awkward
Or, maybe you're concerned about the NSA.
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spongebob squarepants and patrick smashing a computer
Either way, it just sounds like you're really thirsty right now ...
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Hannibal Buress wack
... and this is the only way you can think of to get it. By loudly announcing your exit.
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And you'll probably be back in a month or two.
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Liza Minnelli as Sally Bowles in "Cabaret"
Or, at least when you realize Facebook is the only way anyone will ever remember your birthday.
Photo: Giphy
Steve Carell in "The Office"



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