No, we're not angry at the world.
It doesn't matter what event we're hitting up next; a black wardrobe is always on our agenda. Despite popular belief, our love of black attire has nothing to do with our mood and everything to do with how comfortable we're feeling that day.
These are just a few of the things you need to understand about falling in love with a woman who wears black All. Of. The. Time.
1. We're not angry at the world.
2. (But maybe we are. *evil laughter*)
3. We're not goth.
4. We're always miraculously 5 pounds skinnier than you because = black.
5. We can literally buy any accessory we want because YAY: everything matches with black.
6. Same goes with heels.
7. Same goes with eye shadows.
8.. Getting ready in the morning takes seconds. SECONDS, people.
9. Snow White pale or J. Lo glow = both skin types work for us.
10. We can never not look chic because black never goes out of style.
11. We can attend a funeral in seconds.
12. Don't call us Wednesday Addams.
13. Yes, black is a summer color. How dare you.
14. And yes, we also have other colors in our closet. We refer to them as our step-children.
15. We identify with blank panthers, black bears, black cats, well, you get the idea.
16. You know what looks good with black? A BOLD RED LIP.
17. You know what also looks good with black? NAKEDNESS.