5 Ways To Train Your Husband To Do Basically Whatever You Want

train your hubs

We're totally kidding about this one, guys. Or are we?

Perched on my mother-in-law's bookshelf is a book titled, The Proper Care and Keeping of Husbands.

Coming across it one day, I couldn't help but snort at the title and, of course, the book's infamous author, none other than Dr. Laura, a woman who advises women to have sex with their husbands whenever their men want it, even when they're not feelin' it.


Obviously, I don't believe in keeping husbands like one keeps a lap dog ... and so sorry Dr. Laura, but we're just going to have to agree to disagree on the sex thing. But on the other hand, maybe the woman is on to something. Because let's face it, after seven years of marriage, I may be guilty of "training" my husband in a few sneaky ways.

1. Implementing visual cues.

My husband has the uncanny ability to cram every last piece of crap in the garbage bin until it's literally a leaning tower of trash. I don't know how he does it but the man refuses to actually take out the garbage and instead piles it higher and higher and higher, returning it underneath the sink for me to deal with. It used to drive me nuts and despite me asking him to kindly take the bag out, it would never happen.

So imagine my surprise when instead of asking him to take it out, I simply took to bagging up the garbage and leaving it directly in front of the garage door so when he leaves for the day, he can't help but take it out if he wishes to actually open the door. Nary a word has passed between us, but what has changed? The garbage now gets taken out on a consistent basis.

2. Using sex as a tool.

Just kidding, no woman would ever do that.

3. Doing the slow boil.

Increase the water on the frog and you end up with delicious frog legs, right? Husbands happen to be no different. In my particular case, I really wanted to make exercise an every day part of my day without getting up at 3 AM to get it done. My solution was to start slipping in a quick workout before dinner, casually asking if it was OK until eventually it became routine and my husband is left bewildered and alone in the kitchen with a boiling pot, wooden spoon, and four hungry children.

(Kidding again — he's actually a really good cook, so he's not bewildered at all!)

4. Using food rewards.  

Maybe whipping up a batch of homemade chocolate chip cookies in the middle of the week is a ploy, maybe it's not. I'll never tell. Is that a bell I hear ringing?

5. Employing reverse psychology.

Husbands are famous (well my husband is, anyways) for wanting to make their wives happy simply in order to keep the peace. Example: "Whatever you want for dinner, honey." It can be hard to uncover what they heck is really going on in those handsome brains. So maybe I've used a little reverse psychology to get what I really want. Men love a woman with brains, right?


Explore YourTango