Is your sex life in unhealthy territory?
They say that a man's sexual peak is at when he hits 21. From a young age, men are just raring to go, which may explain why many hump and ask questions (what's your name again?) later. If you like sex, that's great news. You have a walking penis at your disposal.
But what if you want to build a relationship outside the boudoir? What if your man is so into sex that you're having trouble walking straight? Chica, that is not a good look.
Aside from your vagina’s emotional health (those cries are not due to pleasure), your "relationship" may be squatting in unhealthy territory. That man who jumps on you even when you're rocking chancletas and hair curlers may be addicted to sex.
Here are signs to know for sure.
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1. Masturbating Machine
If your boo always has his hands down his pants, he may be addicted to pleasure. According to Mark A. Michaels and Patricia Johnson, authors of Partners in Passion: A Guide to Great Sex, Emotional Intimacy and Long-Term Love, "compulsive masturbation" may also be a way "of managing not only generalized anxiety, but also anxiety about sex itself." He may be addicted to sex and anxious about it all on once.
In other words, it may be time for him to see a therapist to deal.
2. Porn Connoisseur
Just like winos love wine, sex addicts love porn. What man doesn't right? Right. However, men addicted to sex will watch porn all the time and via all mediums. DVD, VOD, porn hubs online: if they got it, he's watching! In the bedroom, in the bathroom, at lunch: as Shakira sang, “wherever, whenever!” He may even watch while he does you. It’s hot until he pushes your head out of the way. You’re blocking the Playboy channel, honey!
3. Constant Cheating
People cheat, which is why many of us have trouble trusting our partners. If you’re in a relationship with a sex addict, that fear is constant. That’s because a sex addict will have little to no control of sexual impulses.
“If you are finding it difficult to resist urges that conflict with your basic values or involve any form of non consensual activity, you should seek professional help,” Michaels and Johnson recommended. In other words, if he can’t keep it in his pants no matter how hard he tries, your relationship is in danger, girl.
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4. Feeling of Shame or Guilt
Some men can be dogs. They will boast about cheating and sleeping with hundreds of women like they deserve a prize. However, a man that is a sex addict will feel terrible about his behavior, and not just when he gets caught. He feels dirty and guilty. He feels a great sense of shame. If you see these signs, he may be a sex addict. He may promise to change but if he doesn’t work through these issues, back to the brothel he will go.
No matter how much you love sex there is such a thing as having too much of it. If you suspect your man is a sex addict, talk to him about his impulses and behavior. Instead of accusing him of being a dirty dog, really listen to what he is saying via words and actions. This way you can get him the help he needs and give your vagina a much-needed break.
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This article was originally published at Latina. Reprinted with permission from the author.