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Here's how your face gives away secrets about your love life.
By Amanda Chatel — Last updated on Nov 13, 2023
The human face is far more intricate in its ability to convey your inner thoughts than you think. While it may be easy to break up facial expressions into just a handful of categories — happy, sad, confused, angry, and the like — the reality is that your face can actually make 7,000 distinct, completely different expressions.
Pretty impressive, eh?
And with those 7,000 expressions, you're literally an open book for those who practice the ancient art of face reading. For more than 3,000 years, the Chinese have been able to see exactly what you really mean just from the tiniest and even most subtle expressions.
I bet you didn't know that your overly plucked, thin eyebrows mean you're not interested in intimacy, did you?
As with any practice of understanding humanity and emotions, this face-reading stuff, if you really get good at it, can be the winning ticket to truly understanding the desires of those around you.
Not only will you be able to know, really know, that someone with thin eyebrows is an icy, cold, asexual being, but those with bushy eyebrows are so intimate that if they don't get it enough, they're liable to go looking for it elsewhere.
At least this is according to relationship expert Tracey Cox who claims that the lines around her nose mean that she pretty much thinks about intimacy 24/7, among other things.
Here are other points of interest on your face that you may want to know about (as declared by Ms. Cox).
Here is what your face says about your love life, according to a relationship expert:
1. If you have pale eyes, you like being intimate but want to get in and out and move on to the next person
This is because you don't get attached easily and are therefore, probably, incapable of love.
2. Those with dark eyes, on the other hand, are passionate, and intense, and make the best lovers
Basically, just having brown eyes alone means all you have to do is show up, and you'll blow minds with your skills.
3. When it comes to noses you'll probably prefer a "bumpy" nose, as opposed to a "snub" nose
People with "bumpy" noses, as opposed to "snub" noses are kinky people. Snub-nosed people are boring and big fans of the missionary position. Cox calls you people "drippy" lovers. Sorry!
4. Thin lines under the lower eyelids mean that someone has an appetite for intimacy for the record books and that "nothing is forbidden and everything goes"
Yes, this means you like unusual things, because what else is "everything goes" a euphemism for?
5. If you have fine lines under your nose, then you're someone who rarely thinks about anything else but intimacy
Blessed/cursed with the highest libido of all, they need to be loved in every way possible and are extremely hard to satisfy."
6. If you have a large mouth, you are an unselfish lover
You live to take your time and if you're a dude with a large mouth, you're "unbeatably potent."
7. The same can not be said for those with small mouths
They finish too quickly, are not affectionate, and have a low tolerance for people.
8. Full-bottomed-lip people are cheaters
(You can’t talk your way out of it, because Cox and her face-reading techniques declare it so.)
While the studying of facial expressions is a real thing, based on Cox and how she describes the best lovers out there, her explanations might be a bit biased.
As someone who has the exact opposite features of her, based on her theories, I totally suck in bed, as does every other blue-eyed person with a small mouth. I mean, maybe I do, but I can't imagine it's that way for all of us with these features — or could it be?
I don't know; you tell me how right or wrong you think this Tracey Cox the "expert" is. Now excuse me while I try to grow back my eyebrows.
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Amanda Chatel is an essayist and intimacy health writer for Yourtango, Shape Magazine, Hello Giggles, Glamour, and Harper's Bazaar.