The always amazing Leonardo Dicaprio stars in The Wolf of Wall Street as Jordan Belfort, a stockbroker who pocketed millions through illegal business practices and served time in prison for his crimes.
The film, which is based on Belfort's memoir of the same name, follows the stockbroker's rise to wealth and creating his own firm to his fall from the high life. Naturally, this movie isn't meant to glamorize one man's life of crime and fraud, but rather to serve as a cautionary tale that your lies eventually catch up to you.
And that's why we've rounded up love lessons from Wolfie and his crew. Consider this a tale of what not to do when it comes to matters of the heart:
1. Money can indeed get you a gorgeous trophy wife.
Jordan did seem happy and in love with his first wife. They married young, and he really wanted to take care of her. But as he worked his way up the corporate ladder and began to dabble in the partying Wall Street lifestyle, they drifted apart. Eventually, she found him canoodling in the backseat of a limo with future wife No. 2. This was a woman who was drawn to the fast-paced, cash-crazed lifestyle. She wanted fancy dresses, amazing vacations, fast cars and expensive meals. Sounds like true love, right?
2. But being a sex and drug addict cheating money launderer could be the reason you lose her. Just saying.
At first, Naomi (Margot Robbie) was wined and dined by Jordan. But after they got married, she started to see just what kind of life he was really living. And after having a few kids and seeing her world start to crumble when the FBI started knocking, Naomi had had enough and Jordan lost his trophy wife.
3. Don't sleep with hookers. Ever.
Whether it's at work, on your yacht, on a private plane, or in a strip club, just don't do it. At some point, you will get an STI. And nobody wants that. Stay faithful. It's really not that hard.
4. Don't be THAT guy at a pool party.
This wise lesson comes courtesy of Donnie Azoff (Jonah Hill), who gets so high at a raging pool party that he begins to jerk off in the middle of the crowd when he sees a beautiful woman (who, in turn, becomes Jordan's wife).
5. At the end of the day, money still can't buy happiness.
Jordan's life came crashing down just as quickly as he skyrocketed. However, despite his multiple felony acts, he only served 20-something months in prison. To this day, he is still required to pay restitution to the clients he defrauded. So, guess where his profits from this movie (where he landed a 'producer' credit) are going? Karma's a bitch.
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