The Solution: Dr. Sherman points out how little time watching a shared show actually takes but how big the impact can be on a relationship, and so to really think twice if you’re considering watching a show you know your partner would want to watch with you. If you’re the “victim,” she says to let your S.O. know -- without blaming or attacking -- how much it hurt your feelings and what the shared viewing time means to you.
3. The Problem: He likes sports, I like crime procedurals.
So he’s a sports nut and you watch every SVU, CSI and other acronym on TV. Are you doomed to a life of solo TV viewership?
New Yorker Natalie G. and her boyfriend, Nick, make efforts to watch each other’s favorite shows (bridal shows on TLC for her; crime shows and documentaries for him), but the night usually ends with the less-interested party asleep on the couch. Luckily, they've also found a few shows that they both enjoy – like Parks & Recreation and anything with Anthony Bourdain in it – and often build date nights around watching them together.
The Solution: As Natalie’s example shows, it’s not always best to try and “convert” your guy into loving Orange Is The New Black or have him turn you on to The Goldbergs. There’s nothing wrong with maintaining different tastes, and if you can find a few shared shows that you both enjoy -- great!
If not, however, Dr. Sherman says: “This is totally OK. Research shows compatibility isn't what determines happiness.” It’s not about always finding agreement -- but alignment. In other words, it’s about being happy knowing that he’s in heaven watching his hockey game at home while you’re watching the Downton Abbey season premiere on your pal’s couch. Or, even better, with the all-new TiVo Roamio Pro’s ability to stream live television to multiple devices, your man can watch the big game on the big screen while you snuggle up next to him and tune into HBO Girls. Ahhh…quality time, redefined.
4. The Problem: DVR Disasters
There’s nothing like settling into the couch with a glass of wine and your remote at the end of a long day only to realize the show you’ve been waiting to watch wasn’t recorded. Misery. And if your S.O. was the perpetrator who happened to have deleted it? Double misery.
The Solution: Of course, everyone makes mistakes. Careless DVR management, like deleting your partner’s favorite show or forgetting to record it in the first place, can feel very raw, and lead to questioning your importance in his or her mind. The best thing to do in moments like these is to first cool off. Taking a step back to look at the big picture by asking yourself “Is this slip-up going to seem important to me next week? Next month? Next year?” can help to give perspective. Or, avoid the DVR-rama altogether -- the TiVo Roamio Pro allows you to undelete recently deleted shows. Seriously, these guys think of everything!
5. The Problem: He likes it loud; you fear going deaf.
Among couples, it seems, there’s always one partner who cares a lot more about speaker output and quality than the other. My fiance, for example, has our TV room decked out and understandably wants to watch all shows on our smart TV at “movie theater” volume to make the most of his surround-sound setup. I, on the other hand, would be just as happy streaming something via my six-year-old laptop.
The Solution: If the volume level is a matter of necessity, like in my parents’ case (my dad is hard of hearing), there’s a plethora of wireless headphones on the market that allow one listener to pump up the volume without blasting out the other’s eardrums.
If it’s simply a matter of preference and you’re having frequent arguments about it, Dr. Sherman recommends taking the time to sit down and discuss the feelings surrounding this issue. Chances are the argument is not really about the volume but instead about one partner wanting his or her feelings to be, well, heard.
6. The Problem: Mismatched TV libidos
Katie R., of Sausalito, Calif. admits she's not one to turn down a Sex and the City or Pretty Little Liars marathon, but her TV intake pales greatly in comparison to her husband Jason's "hours after work and all day on weekends if we have no plans" habit.
"If we have plans or I have a solid idea for non-TV time, he turns it off or records for another time," she says. "It's more that TV is his default." Katie, on the other hand, says she's more inclined to decompress after work with a magazine, Pinterest or an art project.
The Solution: In the case of Katie and Jason, while Katie doesn't love how much TV he watches – or the quality of all the shows he chooses – she says getting resentful is not the solution.
"I just need to speak up and ask nicely," she says. "He is happy to let me put something else on 99% of the time. When all else fails, I put on my earbuds and drown out the sound with my music and go to another room."
“Watching TV” no longer means being glued to an actual television. With streaming on the rise, if your partner needs silence in one room, it’s easy just to pick up your iPad and move into another. Even for DVR lovers, new devices like the all-new Tivo Roamio series DVRs allow recorded shows to be streamed on any device -- not just the TV it’s connected to. And a newly introduced feature of the Roamio, is the ability to watch a recorded show anywhere you can connect to Wi-Fi. Kind of revolutionary, isn’t it?
TiVo's all-new Roamio Pro stops clicker bickers before they start. It allows you to watch, stream or record up to six shows at a time--plus watch via TV or mobile device. It holds up to 450 hours of HD recordings and even allows you to undelete shows. It's the next best thing to having a "delete" button for fights with your S.O.!