A Tori Spelling Sex Tape? No Thanks!

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Celebrity Sex: A Tori Spelling Sex Video? No Thanks!
For the love of '90210,' a plea for Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott to keep their sex tape private!

Tori Spelling and husband Dean McDermott just happened to make a sex video on Valentine's Day 2009. And according to Tori, they just happened to get the angles perfect. They just happened to upload it without password protection, and a former friend of McDermott's just happened to see it and just happened to leak it. This all just happened to emerge just as Spelling admits she's having financial problems. Does this smell fishy to anyone else?

Former rich kid Spelling acknowledges the couple is being "more restrictive of what they spend" (read: Spelling claims they can't afford a vasectomy) because they don't currently have a reality show on the air. The same reasoning should be why she and McDermott don't release a sex tape: No one wants to see it. Seriously. No one.

And if you do, as open-minded as I am about just about everything, I'm judging you a little. 

Here's why: It's exploitative. If their story is true, willingly selling and releasing their sex tape to the likes of Vivid Video—Farrah Abraham's old stomping ground who's rumored to have offered "millions" for their recorded rendezvous—is profiting off of their own stupidity. Again, only if the story is true, because, well, what did they think would happen with a sex tape that anyone near their laptop could see, access and disseminate?

I know I'm judging. Not because they've got an active sex life, but because they'd expose and exploit it, knowing they have kids who can Google them someday, just so they could afford a vasectomy. C'mon, guys. You have kids together. Four of them! And now you have access to Obamacare.

If you really want to snip it without breaking the bank, use your notoriety to launch a Kickstarter so I never have to imagine nor report on this again. I'll be happy to donate if it means never having to picture Donna Martin and that guy from that other thing naked. Ever.

 

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