3 Ways to Improve Sex with Your Older Man Without Viagra - See mo

By

3 Ways to Improve Sex with Your Older Man Without Viagra - See mo
One of the biggest problems with me and my older lover isn’t where to get intimate or what to try.

One of the biggest problems with me and my older lover isn’t where to get intimate or what to try—and, so far, we have been lucky to not have to worry about that “blue pill.” Our biggest problem has been our difference in sex drive. With my man’s packed work schedule, and with me juggling work and motherhood, when we are together, I crave sex and intimacy. I would want to make love multiple times a week, whereas he is perfectly fine with doing it once a month. He is completely OK if we are not intimate on a regular basis. He is, without a doubt, a great lover, but he says that as he has aged, it has become something that he is OK with.

What do you do, though, if you and your older man have different sex drives? It can often leave you feeling unwanted, or it can lead to him feeling like you’ll go “find it somewhere else.” It’s important to have a sexual relationship that is good for both partners. Here are a few things that can help you to work through the kinks to figure out what works best for you.

Try new things, like being a little more romantic. Little gestures can go a long way in putting someone in a relaxed and happy mood. Maybe try backing off a little, or avoid trying to initiate sex for a while. When you’re constantly clingy and trying to make a move, your partner will pull away. You’ll get upset when they reject you, and the cycle continues. If you let them initiate it, it may take a little longer, but the experience might be more enjoyable. Try to be affectionate with him, but without heading for his nether regions. Give him a backrub just for the sake of it, and not because you want it to end in sex. Sometimes, when a partner does things that are unexpected or that you don’t usually do, it brings back a newness or freshness you had when you first started dating. Kissing, cuddling, and holding hands are all very intimate and can help strengthen a relationship.

If you’re really feeling frustrated, use a little self love. It’s unreasonable for you to expect a partner to constantly service you when you’re in the mood. If your older man is making the effort to care for your needs in the relationship, sometimes you just need to accept that you’re sexually different from one another and take care of yourself every once in a while, but without feeling embarrassed or resentful. This can also be a time for you to try new things, like toys or lubes, that, when you are intimate with your partner, can help you or him last longer—it might make you both last longer, making things more satisfying when you are intimate.

The most important point is that you shouldn’t take it personally. If you are the one with a higher sex drive, being rejected when making a move doesn’t mean disinterest in sex or in you. It doesn’t mean you’re any less attractive to him. If the problem continues, you can always see a couples counselor for more help or options. It’s a very common problem and your relationship will be better for it.

Must-see Videos
SEE MORE VIDEOS
Stories we love
FROM AROUND THE WEB
  • Out of nearly 100,000 people surveyed, 72% never take a vacation as a couple.