Alternatively, what decision drivers lead a person to choose to leave?
The decision to leave becomes clear again when you have released all the layers of pain and hurt when you work on your own issues but there's often the additional filter of fear that needs to be addressed. Every relationship is meant to last for a season, a reason, or a lifetime. Tapping and releasing your fears about ending a relationship that has really run it's course will allow you to see and feel that it was helpful in your life's journey to be with that other person but that the stagnation needs to end for you to grow even more.
For the people who choose to stay, what changes need to be done so that both partners experience an improvement in the relationship?
There are lots of changes that need to happen for a person to stay but the biggest one is not to expect the other person to change and heal what is in you first.
And for the people who choose to stay, what lessons can they bring into the next relationship so they don't repeat the pattern? Why did the unhappy unions come together in the first place?
When someone ends the relationship it is imperative to take the time to heal and tap on the roots of those dysfunctional patterns so that they do not repeat themselves.
What have you learned are the major causes of break-ups or divorces in long-term relationships that are irreconcilable?
I've been at this for a long time and quite honestly the #1 reason why marriages and relationships fail is because people aren't taught that their upbringing has a profound impression on who they pick as a partner as well as how they themselves will be inside a romantic relationship. If that was taught (which we do with our single clients) then people would be uber selective and heal themselves a bit first.
How can people best prepare themselves using an EFT as their practice to (A) choose the right partner for a healthy long-term mutually satisfying relationship, and (B) cultivate the skills in communications, conflict resolution, etc to sustain a happy union? Do you have examples of pairings that come together with great intensity and excitement that have a high probability of ending up in divorce? What drew them together in the first place and whom would have been a better option if they had known better at the time.
Yes, people can prepare by using EFT effectively (not on a Youtube video as those are rather ineffective) on past events in their lives and that will both contribute to them finding the right person and communicate well. When they don't then they are likely to be in reactive mode and when that happens communication is always off because it's automatic. The very idea that most couples's trainings/retreats use with communication skills is comical to me! I say this, when you say that is impossible when we are in flight, freeze, or flea response. Getting rid of the real triggers at their original source will make communication effortless.