EFT practitioner Alina Frank used her knowledge and expertise in EFT to create a program on coming to a decision on whether to stay or go. In the following Q&A she explains how it works to aid in making a critical decision on ending a relationship.
What are the 5 lessons in this course?
All the lessons in the When To End It, When Stay online course are designed to take one from the personal to the problems that are more global and universal. There is a focus on working through childhood issues that effect romantic relationships. Another that focuses on what's happening currently in the relationship you are in and the early signs of trouble. It's all based on the work we've done with ourselves as well with thousands of clients. A marriage and family therapist who saw the unveiling of the model we use at a conference came up to us at the end and said she'd never seen anything that capture conflict in a relationship quite as well as we did in that model.
How does EFT help in decision making if someone is choosing whether to leave a relationship or not?
EFT (also known as the tapping technique) access the subconscious mind and allows one to find the many connections and associations that have led to both patterns of dysfunction in relationship as well as why we attract a certain type of person as a partner to begin with. Once that's discovered and resolved through the When To End It, When To Stay course then the decision becomes very clear. Leaving a relationship should never be about fleeing but about going towards a better life. Staying in a relationship should never be about maintaining status quo and not upsetting the apple cart as it were. Neither will produces, attract, or promote a blissful life for either person involved.
What kind of homework assignments are included in the course?
The homework assignments are based on the tapping. We clearly explain EFT tapping and guide you through the process of releasing the blocks that you are instructed to find in each lesson. It also helps with keeping you motivated and accountable after all this is a self-help course.
How did you design the material and contents for the course with the intention of helping a person make the right choice for them?
The way we went about designing the program came from both our personal and professional backgrounds. Both Craig and I were in relationships for nearly 20 years that weren't optimal for us. We were stuck is dysfunctional spin cycles with those other people and if we had the information we share in this course we could have made the decision to leave sooner. Our pain and anguish has served the world well though because we both now help others with this process and feel we know all to well the confusion that's present.
In your opinion, what decision drivers lead a person to choose to stay?
The decision to stay is clear once you work through your own issues and can observe the relationship from a neutral places without all the layers of hurt and pain. A few things happen that make the answer obvious, one is that your partner will likely change. If the love is still there underneath it all then the decision to stay is the path.