A Self-Help Intervention
"It may sound strange, but I sacrificed being selfish for my relationship. I've had some health issues in my life, namely that I am bipolar, and in the past it's always been something I deal with on my own. I've been reluctant to take medication before, and I can think of a thousand things I'd rather do than sit in a doctor's office. But when you're with someone you have to consider how your health affects him, too.
About a year and a half into my relationship with my now-husband, I suffered through a really bad bout of depression. At one point I realized our relationship was in serious jeopardy — I wouldn't have wanted to be with me either! I reached out for help, I spent some time in the hospital, and I started taking meds again. Soon I was feeling better and our relationship was back on track.
Now, I try to stay healthy and take better care of myself. Yes, I owe it to me, but I owe it to my husband and to our life together, too. It took me years to realize that." —Kimberly, Lancaster, PA
Giving Up "Me" For "We"
"Hands down the biggest thing I've sacrificed is alone time. My boyfriend, Jeremy, and I moved in together about a year ago. Overall, it's been a great experience and I love spending time with him, but it's become blatantly clear that I need some me-time to recharge, while he's happy being together ... all the time.
It's nothing against Jeremy — I couldn't be more in love with a person. I think I'm just wired differently. When we we're dating, I'd always keep a couple nights to myself to read or watch a movie. Obviously, I can't do that as much anymore (it's not like I'm going to force him out on the street each Tuesday), so I'm adjusting. While I may not get entire evenings, I do get an hour here and there and I'm willing to make that work. I'm also learning to be much more generous with my time, and, surprisingly, I've found that some of the things I liked to do alone, like baking or watching trashy reality TV, are actually more fun with Jeremy around." —Angela, Santa Monica, CA