And because of our inability to comprehend this kind of forgiveness, linked unfortunately as it is with shame and weakness, we fail to recognize that Huma is standing up for the very values that everyone claims are dying: Family. Commitment. Compassion. There's much bemoaning the divorce rate, and yet with our instinct for cutting and running at the first (or second) sign of trouble, is it any wonder why so many marriages end?
I've said it once and I'll say it again: A true feminist operates from a position of power, and makes choices based on what she wants, not what she fears. Huma isn't about to just up and toss what she's worked hard to build, just because you think she "deserves better." This is the man she chose and continues to choose. Until the day she stops choosing him. And while no one would fault her for that, we are faulting her for staying. And that’s f'ed up.
If you believe in feminism, then you support a woman's right to choose—in every area of her life. But here's the catch: You can't be for a woman’s right to choose only insofar as you agree with her choice. Ten years ago, I'd be so sure what I would and wouldn't stand for. Now, I'm not so sure. And until you’re in that position, you won’t know either. But I respect a strong woman's choice even if I'm not sure it would be one I'd make.