The Butt Of The Joke
"I’d been texting with this guy I met online. We still hadn't met in person yet, but our messages had been pretty steady for about a week. He was out of town for business and he was texting me about his hotel room, describing his view of the parking lot and discussing the products in the mini bar. All of a sudden a picture popped up on my phone. It was an over-the-shoulder shot of his ass in the mirror. Then he sent a message, "How do you like this view?" We had never even said anything sexual so it was completely out of the blue. Also, I did some sleuthing and it looked like there was a pair of shorts on the bed. It was winter when we were talking, so I'm pretty sure it was a picture he keeps in his back pocket to send to girls. Real cool, dude." — Sarah
Blame It On The Dog
"I really hate audience participation and I made that clear when a guy I met online asked if I wanted to go to an improv show. He assured me there'd be no audience participation, so I agreed. The second we got there everyone in the audience had to put on a nametag. F*ck, I thought. I was a nervous wreck the entire show and my stomach was making all these weird, really loud noises. Maybe it was jitters or maybe it was the Thai food we'd eaten earlier that night; there’s no way to be certain. All I know is, at the absolute quietest moment of the show, I let one rip. Even the actor on stage looked distracted. Mortified doesn’t begin to describe how I felt. The guy teased me the rest of the night about my special kind of audience participation." — Chelsea
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