What ever happen to the concept of the virgin and waiting to have sex until you get married?
“But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband” (1 Corinthians 7:2). Is this verse in the Bible about sex before marriage no longer applicable? I am just curious to hear your point of view, ladies. I am not a preacher. I am just asking.
Black’s Law Dictionary, Fourth Edition defines “immoral” as “inconsistent with the rules and principles of morality.” I am using Black’s Law Dictionary because the Bible is a book filled with natural laws and principles that govern all relationships. A plane flies and a battleship floats if you follow the same laws and principles every single time. So if we are acting in an immoral way, it would suffice to say that we are working against the very principles that lead to our success. Hmmm. Food for thought. Let’s continue.
The whole problem with sexual immorality is that it harms our “right thinking,” especially for women, who are emotionally driven, because we are letting our body rule over its creator, our spirit. When we are led by our bodies, we imprison our intuition or spirit, and thus our ability to think clearly, e.g.,“Suzy can never seem to make the right decision at the right time.” Women may think they have the ability to sleep with multiple men, but eventually get confused. It usually backfires. This is simply because men detest women who do this, unless it’s their profession.
I know what you are thinking: It’s the food! It’s the genetically-modified organisms (GMOs). Yes, maybe that is partially true, but don’t blame your actions on food. The reality is that when given the option to wait until marriage or to have sex whenever they desire, today’s women have almost unanimously chosen the latter.
Wow, is all I can say. But I am confused. So, you mean to tell me that all throughout history, women were just playing the virgin role because society dictated it, when all they wanted to do was get naked and have sex whenever they chose? Darn. All you had to do was just tell us that’s what you wanted, and we could have saved a hundred years and a whole lot of man-hours. But the catch is that men, and people in general, don’t like or appreciate something that comes too easily.
The baby boomers were really horny. They had so much sex that they created a movement. Now they are trying to restrict us from having sex through condoms, birth control and fear of disease. (Let’s Talk About Sex Baby!) Okay, that’s hilarious. They all had their fun and now want to stifle our freedom of movement. What happened? What did they discover? All jokes aside, let’s get back into the meat of our discussion.
I really want to know what happened to the concept of the virgin. I asked this question recently at a relationship conference and the women looked at me with such disdain and laughter, it was like I had said something straight out of the 19th century. These days, women are having just as much sexual intercourse as men. (Ladies, What’s Up With The Ovulation Kit?) Herein lies the problem. In a man’s mind, he still prefers a virgin, or at least a modern-day virgin, i.e., a woman who has slept with five or fewer men. Now, when you get up in the 10s or even 20s and you don’t remember, don’t want to discuss it or say “next question, please,” we have a problem. You see, men desire to marry virgins, as opposed to women who have slept with numerous men. Many of you remain single for this very reason--a secret men keep to themselves:
“Hey, Tim, have you seen Suzy? I am interested in her.”
“Mike, Suzy has been around the block a few times, to say the least. You might want to consider other options.”
I know you are screaming, “Not fair!” Ladies, I did not make the rules. I am here to help you reach your goal of finding and keeping the Man of your Dreams (MOYD) by giving the absolute honest truth and a clear understanding of how men think and feel.
So what to do? Well, obviously we cannot turn back the hands of time, but what you can do is constantly have a clear understanding of how men think and feel and continuously invest in being the best person you can be. This will attract the best results.
Let’s briefly talk about the significance of women sleeping with numerous men, and how it can get right smack in the way of you finding and keeping the MOYD. First, your reputation precedes you. There is nothing worse for a man than a woman who has slept with a number of his friends and associates. In a small town, you’re dead. In this case, moving and reinventing yourself is often the best solution. It’s downright embarrassing for a man when, as he stands there holding your hand, the fellas are all comparing notes and laughing. This is not good for his advancement or solidifying his future business relationships. Other men are looking at him as if he were dumb or weak. I know it sounds stupid, but this is reality. Men talk and compare notes, especially when it comes to a very well-known, promiscuous woman.
Secondly, women often take on the energy of the man they have been sleeping with. Birds of a feather flock together, meaning that if your man was a no-good bum, and you were with him for a couple of years, than some of those bad habits unknowingly rubbed off onto you. You get used to having to treat him a certain way: “Johnny, are you going to look for a job today, or just play XBox and PlayStation all day long while I work my butt off to take care of this family?” (Are You Losing Respect For Your Man In The Relationship Because You Make More Money?) You’re in control of the finances, the family and the relationship. Now, after breaking up with Johnny, you meet Teddy, who is a responsible man, but you still carry the mental baggage of being with a lazy man for so many years. You sabotage your new relationship with Teddy because you cannot believe a man could be so different. You are so used to talking to a Johnny like he is a little boy that this energy unknowingly comes across in your new relationship. Why? Because, like sponges, women absorb the energy, bad or good, of the men they are sleeping with. This is one of the reasons why a woman can be with one man and stab another in the back at the same time. It depends on whom she is sleeping with, communicating with or loves at that moment. It’s dangerous for men, and it’s an emotional nightmare for all parties. It’s really amazing to see how women who are cheating, or women who enter into a new relationship, change their behavior drastically. They act differently, start to make little smart remarks or cannot go places with their friends anymore. Geez, what happened? Are you in a relationship or in jail? Your man or your friends may not notice at first, but eventually, they will start to see a different you, because you have now taken on the energy of that new man.
Thirdly, taking on another man’s energy often leads to picking up on his bad habits. Conversely, if he is successful and hardworking, you will take some of that energy with you to the next relationship. So you have to be careful that the next man’s energy is not in conflict spiritually, physically or sexually. There is a lot going on in one sexual act; more than you realize. Why? When your animal instincts overrule your intuition, many of the finer vibrations you receive in the sexual union go unnoticed until it’s too late. Then you say, “It was fun while it lasted,” or you regret having sex with that particular man. Now you cannot take it back and it is recorded in the history books, all because you were not conscious of your actions.
You can always tell a lot about a woman by whom she was previously having sex with, and by what she does or does not do, physically and mentally, in her new relationship. If she lacks sexual experience, the man is wondering what type of man tolerated such a lack of performance in the bedroom, if she was not a virgin? If she has too much experience, he is wondering who she was doing it with. (All Vaginas Are Not Sexually Pleasing to the Male Species as Assumed) A man can tell by what you do or don’t do. He can also tell by what you know or don’t know. You cannot fake a sexual encounter or, for that matter, your daily habits. If your man opens the door for you and you sit there while he is struggling, with a bagful of groceries, to get his key in the lock, and you do not even think to open the door, it is a reflection not only on your upbringing but on the type of man you most recently dated. If he is smart, it will be an automatic red flag: “This woman only thinks of herself. I better end this now.” Often, the man knows that you are not the one, but his animal instincts will overrule his intuition, and he continues traveling down a road that he knows he should not. This is the sin against nature; the immoral behavior the Bible often speaks of. It’s doing something because you want to feel good but that you know intuitively is not right for you.
So whatever happened to the concept of the virgin? It seems that we may want to revisit some of the old principles, since they created more success in relationships. Granted, there were fewer distractions in those days, but in a world that is ever-more-challenging and sexual, we may want to build a solid foundation on principles that have been proven to work.
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