Redefining Foreplay: Turn Each Other On Outside The Bedroom


Things are about to get hotter than ever between you and your partner.

2. Pitch in with "choreplay."

A 2010 study by the University of Western Ontario found that women whose husbands help with housework are happier in their marriages. Another study from the University of Illinois that same year reported that men who help with chores tend to have more sex than men who don't. Coincidence? We think not.


When both partners pitch in at home, there are more opportunities to make housework sexy (did somebody say housekeeper fantasy? A little French maid number never hurt anyone). Try cleaning the house together to a sultry soundtrack, or dusting halfway in the buff. Use makeout breaks as incentives for completing tasks. See for yourself if you start looking forward to otherwise mundane activities. Hey, "loading the dishwasher" might become your new favorite sex position.

3. Schedule a sex date.

You're probably thinking, "What could be less romantic?" Sure, most couples only talk about scheduling sex when they're trying to get pregnant, but making an appointment to do the deed can actually make you both hot with anticipation the whole day. Think about it. No, really. There's something so naughty about fantasizing about how you’re going to get your paws on each other that night — while you're in the middle of a client meeting!

And don't forget the fun part: sending each other sexy texts all day as little reminders of what's to come. While you're at it, give it a funny name that'll be your inside joke. If it's Wednesday, make it a literal Hump Day, or call it Frisky Friday or Steak and Sex Night.

4. Exercise together.

Countless studies have linked regular exercise to more frequent and enjoyable sex. People who work out have more energy and flexibility, and they look better. The latter's a win-win. A sexy partner isn't just a good thing to have. It’s a good thing to be — women especially enjoy sex when they feel good about their bodies.

Getting a workout together outside the bedroom has its benefits: not only do you get to see each working up a sweat, but exercising counts as some high-impact quality time! And what better way to motivate and encourage each other to be healthy and feel great? A recent study shows that couples who work out together are 34 percent more likely to stick to it. Sounds like there really is something to the "buddy system" after all.

5. Show you care … even when you’re not around.

When you're first dating someone, the little gestures are everything. So why not bring them back? There's hardly a bigger turn-on than knowing that your partner is thinking about you when you're not together. Fire off flirty texts, take care of tasks or chores you know your partner dreads, or prepare his/her favorite meal. By the time you actually do make it to the bedroom, things might be too hot to handle!

As author, therapist and sex expert Esther Perel says: "It's impossible to be in the heat of the moment, sexually speaking, if you're thinking about your to-do list. The most important turn-on you could give your partner, then, just may be helping him or her check off that list in order to focus on sexier tasks at hand."

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission.
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