Did I Really Learn The Truth At 17?


Did I Really Learn The Truth At 17?
Janis Ian sang that love was meant for Beauty Queens but what about the rest of us?

Nothing makes sense when everything you thought you learned about love at 17 was possibly just plain wrong. No matter how false it was in reality it's a perception that is 100% true in your own mind. What is your identity is so tightly wound up with the ideas of youth that it's made you an expert at pushing love away? Then your unconscious mind has a problem that requires the double talents of Jung and Freud (as long as they don't start feuding) but they are both long gone. Is there any hope?

Brody boys were the ones who never talked to me when I was 17. The term Brody boys comes from Brody Jenner of The Hills fame. You know the type. I was invisible to them as a person. Not on purpose. It's just the way it is or was or is, I don't know really. They only had eyes for the girls next door (think Hugh Hefner and his three girlfriends plus wife young enough to be his great grandkid). On the odd chance Brody boys talked to me it was not nice. They would gush over Carrie Underwood doppelgangers. To the ones who resembled the polar opposite of a Country and Western beauty queen, they spoke so cruelly to her that it proved the lines in a Cher song true.... words are like weapons they wound sometimes.


Throughout my life it was the Bond boys who understood and accepted me. No surprise there since brothers generally like their sisters as is. This term is based on young Sean Connery (the original and only Bond) who is an example of a man strong enough to handle an Athena woman (see my other article on Jungian archetypes on unabashed strong females).

Bond boys were Old World men in teenage form. They were often raised in families with Old World values, often immigrant or first generation sons, and began acting like the man of the house the day they turned 16. These were the ones who would give me the high-five for being direct and determined. Bond boys were my protective older brothers who never stopped encouraging me to demonstrate my intellect. It was they who pointed out my strengths and told me how to put a dumb jock who teased me in their place ... fast. Athena's myth does include a razor sharp wit. Most of all, Bond boys understood what it was like to grow up in two vastly cultures while living in the same place.

The juxtaposition of Bond vs. Brody boys, and how they treated me, were the ideal conditions for an environment that yielded an attitude that was assertive. I stopped caring whether it was lady like or not. My interactions with the opposite gender did not operate from a goal to generate male-to-female favor from them. When push came to shove I had no hesitation to use verbal self-defense if a dark stranger hassled me on the streets. The last guy who followed me into a convenience store to heckle didn't find himself facing a scared skittish female.

I barked at him to back off. Then I told him that I had just taken a photo of his license plate and sent it to my friend. Then I hollered, "Don't follow me. I don't know you. You are harassing me." After snapping back at the fool, I looked into the store's security camera to make sure it was recording. He backed off and didn't dare follow me afterwards. I guess having my keys between my knuckles and making sure he saw that, helped.

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