Titanic II: 9 Things We'd Like To See This Time Around


jack and rose titanic
A new ship is setting sail. Here's what we'd like to happen if Jack & Rose were on board again.

5. More Lifeboats
Pretty obvious, guys. The majority of lives lost when the Titanic sank in 1912 could have been saved if only the White Star line had equipped the ship with the proper number of lifeboats. The safety standards are much stricter now, so I imagine this wouldn't be a problem in the weird, completely made-up universe I'm creating for this 2016-movie-Titanic-journey-parallel-world-thing, but it's worth a mention anyway.

6. Queen Of The World
Let's be real: Rose is the true heroine of this movie. She finds her soulmate, yes, but she also finds self-confidence and the freedom to break away from the stifling confines of her prim, upper-crust Gilded Age life. So, instead of the iconic "I'm the King Of The World" scene with Jack on the prow of the ship, the feminist in me wants to see Rose exulting in her newfound power.


7. Can We Give The Guys Shoveling The Coal Some Water?
Seriously. In the scene when Jack and Rose are running after they've just had sex in the car, they pass by the boiler rooms. The men in there were working hard, shoveling coal in a sweltering room at the bottom of the ship, totally unaware that they'd be the first people to die in just a few hours. Those looked so overheated and dirty and sweaty and whoa. Let's give them a little TLC.

8. Class Equity
Obviously, things today aren't quite as classed as they were in 1912, but the fact of the matter is that even on a modern ship, there'd be more expensive and less expensive quarters, a mix of rich people and people of lesser means. But this time around, let's not lock all of the bright-eyed immigrants hoping for a new life in America downstairs while the water is flooding in. Equal opportunity to save your own life for all!

Mythbusters conclusively proved this theory and justified all the angry words tear-stained women have been shouting out during the end of this movie since 1997. If Jack has to die, like James Cameron says, could he maybe die in some other, heroic way? I'd settle for him punching Cal out and then falling off the boat, even. What would be ideal is if we could have some kind of continuation of his memory — maybe that tryst in the car with Rose results in a tiny blonde artist baby who'll give Rose some measure of comfort in addition to her gigantic diamond.

What do you hope happens on Titanic II?

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